Taking a 365 day break from all forms of gambling...

Quote Originally Posted by kaponofor3:

Beginning today, July 27, 2011. Here's the story.

Got in deep with my local for more money than I probably should have -- chased like a bitch, knew better, but still did it because (like most of us) I'm a degenerate. I am able to pay him off in one lump sum from my savings account, but had to tell the wife about it because that amount of money I need to pay my local today would be greatly noticed once it is missing from our joint accounts. Wife was obviously pissed, didn't know I had a bookie that I was playing with on credit (although I think she probably should have known given that she knew I withdrew all my money from offshore sites after the BetEd fiasco).

Wife is now absolutely worried that I am an addict (this isn't the first time that gambling has been a discussion with us) and, unless I can prove to her that I am not, she will never feel confident in our financial future together. This is all compounded by the fact that we just found out about 2 months ago that Ms. Kap is pregnant for the first time. We decided to try and BAM, I nailed that shit on the first fucking try, no joke. With a potential baby on the way, Ms. Kap is understandably concerned. She said she will have her trust restored in me if I go 365 days without gambling -- which she includes fantasy sports, which I think is NOT gambling, but that's another story -- and if I agree to go to 12 sessions of addiction counseling. If I won't do the addiction counseling, she wants to go to marital therapy.

I have a degree in psychology, so I don't exactly feel like I need any sort of counseling. I let shit get out of hand, I acknowledge it, and I recognize it. I know what a counselor would tell me, I know what they look for, etc.. Nevertheless, I agreed to do it to help ensure future marital tranquility.

I'll still be hanging around the P-Box, GD, and Politics tabs, but I definitely won't be posting plays. This may be a blessing in disguise though, as I can truly try to improve my capping during this downtime and won't be risking any real funds.

Just wanted to put it out there, maybe some others can learn from my story. What would you guys do if you were in my situation and your wife requested you do the same?

damn kap, i would hate to see you off the sports forums (NFL, NBA) but you have to do what you have to do... I wish you well.  But would it be possible that you can just limit your betting to $20 a game?? Doesnt seem like much but it would still add to that extra spice for the game while watching it. 

i'm going to need to see a picture of your wife to properly evaluate your position here.

just joking, kap, do what you have to do and make sure you stay around either way.  things are going to change in a big way and gambling and sports won't as important to you soon.

Your making the right choice Kap. Go to the couseling because this will help your marriage and improve the overall quality of life as you too open a new chapter with a baby on the way. I means lets face, it for some of us our wives keep us grounded and are much more level headed then us. I know if I didn't have the sound advice from my wife, I would probably have done some fucked up things. Once you have your child, life will change and you will look back on this all as a blessing. Stay steadfast, and when your ready to jump back in, know your limts. Congrats and goodluck

Kap-

I have a degree in Pyschology as well and like you, I think I understand addiction.  I haven't placed a wager for over 3 months....not for financial reasons; mainly because I just got burned out.  I didn't have the will to continue the grind.  Baseball is what got me. 

I found out I didn't miss it at all.  But you have to ask yourself why you liked gambling.  Many here love the action....or can't watch a game without action on it.  My motivation was the challenge.  I made a few bucks some years....I lost a few bucks some years.  But it never was about the money or the action.  In fact, I rarely even liked to watch events where I had action.  That's pretty different from your recreational gambler.  Also, many here get a rush win or lose.....so the continual losing doesn't serve as any sort of deterrant to continue gambling.  For me, I liked winning, but I usually got a little pissed when I lost.  Never got a huge rush either way. 

But like I said, you have to really ask yourself why you gamble.

I think you deserve a shot to prove to your wife that you are in control before you run off to treatment. 

I also think fantasy games don't qualify as traditional gambling.  Fantasy games require time and effort. If I take the time to manage my team and I win, I like a little reward for my effort.  Besides, it's an incentive for all owners to try hard and increases the competition.  Also, if you play in both fantasy football and fantasy baseball, that's 2 entry fees per year.  A finite amount of which you know before you even start.  Let's say you do football for $100 and baseball for $50....your wife knows what the costs are up front, where if you have 15-30 options to choose from EACH day, it makes it easier to get out of hand.

Just my $.02.  I

One last thing.  One of my greatest fears is to be stuck without any money....creditors banging down my door....can't meet my obligations.  I have busted my hump to put myself in a good position so I don't have to worry about that unless something REALLY bad happened.  I would never in a million years do anything to jeaopardize that.