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What is the funniest saying/ quote you know?

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Prospect
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Posted: #26
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
 
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Posted: #27
arguing online is like the special olympics, even if you win....you're still a retard

don't let the gray hair fool ya, this is no easy win

PMS= Prepare to Meet Satan
 
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Posted: #28
"Life is like a penis...when it's soft you can't beat it. When it's hard you're getting fucked."
 
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Posted: #29
I swear to God it could be raining box, and I'd be the only guy who got hit in the head with a dick!
 
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Posted: #30

"No poor bastard never won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country"

 

George S. Patton

 
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Posted: #31
"If the shit fits; wear it"


The guy in the blues brothers band
 
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Posted: #32
"Well ive already heard that one you son-of-a-fucking-repeating-shit"



Tollbooth Willie
 
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Posted: #33
I knew this old guy in vegas who used to get hookers all the time, one time when the hooker had finished up and getting dressed,

Hooker: is there anything else you want me 2 do?

Old guy: unless you can turn into a pizza, get the fuck out!!
 
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Posted: #34
People who live in glass houses shoudn't masturbate.
 
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Posted: #35

"Your Sister's Cu*t!"

 

- Uncle Junior.

 
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Posted: #36
"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car."
 
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Posted: #37

My wife and I were naked in bed and nothing was happening. I said to her, what's the matter, you can't think of anyone else either?

 

Rodney

 
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Posted: #38

I told my kid......take out the trash''''they said, u married her ! u take her out!

RD

Oh yea I asked her 4 oral sex''''',,,,,,,,,SHE SPIT ON ME!!!!!!!

I'm here every Tuesday

 

 

 
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Posted: #39
Pizza Hut waitress: "You wanna box for the rest of that pizza?"
My dad: "No, but I'll wrestle you for it."
 
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Posted: #40
Kool story bro

Lord Ace77 the 3rd
 
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Posted: #41
He hit him so many times with a left, he should have begged for a right!
 
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Posted: #42
Quote Originally Posted by Sparky10191:

"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car."


   that was a good one
 
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Posted: #43

Quote Originally Posted by potter36:

"One thing about sodomy...It always gets the point across."

"think of how stupid the average person is, then realize half of them are stupider than that"  George Carlin.

 
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Posted: #44
"I may not be very smart, but I can lift heavy things."
 
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Posted: #45


My wife is such a lousy cook the cockroaches in our yard fixed our screen door.

Rodney D
 
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Posted: #46
I will be monitoring this system closely!
 
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Posted: #47
"Dont sweet the petty and dont pet the sweety"
 
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Posted: #48
I asked the dispatcher  "How long is my cab going to be." He said "about 20 feet."
 
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Posted: #49
Quote Originally Posted by Kelly_Slater:

koman22 if you never heard that line before then you must be 22 years old 

geez. I forget theres a bunch of kids who were born in the 90's on this site

BTW - the line is true.

I had a model / bikini butt person for a long time. Everybody would stare like she has 3 eyes because she was fine. After fucking her every which way for 3 years --- I was bored and sick of her bitchiness and prep time. Why do you think movie star fuck slags??

In the end im way more attracted to really fine/cute/pretty girls that have more to offer and are much better people in general


Ha I am around that age. Covers is teaching me a lot of life lessons for sure.  
 
 
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Posted: #50
Quote Originally Posted by oakster:

I swear to God it could be raining box, and I'd be the only guy who got hit in the head with a dick!
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