Christiano Ronaldo

Purest soap opera, straight out of a bad Hollywood movie. Something Disney would make a movie out of if Ronaldo were an American–

(Cue bad music underscoring)–Outstanding (and of course handsome) athlete is told his career, maybe even his life, is on the line if he plays. He tells the doctor, “I’m playing because my team needs me.” Wife (blonde, generic, wholesome, pretty, implants but not large ones) tells him, “Think about our SON.” He says, “I’m doing this for HIM, so he can respect his father when he grows up.” Heroically plays, and of course scores the winning goal with seconds remaining. Leaves the field, somehow without reporters or teammates, with his son in his arms and his wife by his side. (Cue louder bad music, go to credits)