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getting dumped....how did you get over it?

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Posted: #176
Hang in there Mess. You got friends here dude.
 
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Posted: #177
Quote Originally Posted by Messier-11:

Shits driving me crazy. I'm trying to be strong. Been working out a lot and trying to stay busy. Seems like every song on the radio is about love and getting heartbroken. Every movie on tv is the same way. Mind fucking me. And almost everything seems to remind me of her. I went out for breakfast this morning and got eggs benedict.....one of her favorites and it made me sad to think about even though its one of mine also. Do i throw out all the shit that reminds me of her? My ipod, sunglasses, pictures, etc? This shit blows and the Xanax has only really helped me get sleep at night. I don't take it during the day so i can be active. I have also lost all interest in gambling. Fired out a few plays today but I already feel like they will probably lose anyway. Maybe I should just cash out or try and double up a few times then cashout or be done with it for a while. She called me two nights ago late at night and we had an amazing convo for 40 minutes. Felt like things were gonna go back to normal. i texted her the next morning how I missed her and things got weird again. She didn't talk to me since. I am now on board with pretending she is dead and moving on for real. Its fucking tough though.



Messier,  you may be still too young to realize that this is a growing up issue for you.  its all about learning how to process emotional pain and also process that if a chick does not want to be with you then just move on like a man after a chick walks.  feel the pain but push it away after your next BJ. 

i will tell you this and you can tell me to f-off but if you cant put this away real soon (as in not crying or feeling sorry for yourself)  you need to go get some books on how to deal with such items. 

i had it bad when i was 21 and then again from the same girl 2 yrs later after long distance failed....i wish someone had slapped my whiny ass and told me to man up.  oh yeah,  sex with any chick helped it for me but i should have never even needed it through realizing that heartache is part of life, just dont let it consume you.  GL
 
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Posted: #178
Ya I'm trying my best. Just sucks sometimes. Mainly right before bed and when I wake up. I think this breakup was the wake up call I needed. I am more motivated then ever at the moment. I've been working out like a mad men and hitting the books hard. If I ever run into her again she'll realize the mistake she made. Until then I can only work on bettering myself and not worrying about things out of my control. Fuck it....time will heal this wound. Thanks for everything guys
 
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Posted: #179

sorry to hear Mess but you should really disconnect from her for a bit and do you......I ve been on both sides of the dumping, keeping busy with life and doing things that make you happy is real important especially early after the relationship.  Women in general are enablers and security is a huge factor in their lives. The fact its long distance doesn t help the cause

If they can keep you around and know they can count on you for different things they will keep you in their lives in different capacities.  Doesn t mean you cant be in her life but now is not the time.  You dont need to tell her but basically having the mindset, I gave 100% of myself to you and its seems you(girl) dont want me as a partner does not give you the right to have me in your life as support, or a security blanket.  It ll be hard but disconnect for awhile and she'll realize things aren t rosier elsewhere.  Give it a few weeks and if what you said was right about have a blast when she came to see you, she'll be contacting you again real soon and might be changing her thoughts and/or ideas......etc.....

 
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Posted: #180
[Quote: Originally Posted by Messier-11] Ya I'm trying my best. Just sucks sometimes. Mainly right before bed and when I wake up. I think this breakup was the wake up call I needed. I am more motivated then ever at the moment. I've been working out like a mad men and hitting the books hard. If I ever run into her again she'll realize the mistake she made. Until then I can only work on bettering myself and not worrying about things out of my control. Fuck it....time will heal this wound. Thanks for everything guys [/Quot
 Never put a woman on a pedestal because they will trample all over your heart. Stay in control at all times and remember in the end "she" chooses you....You dont choose her. So always be prepared to walk away if need be knowing full well that the next one is around the corner. You are your own woman control center.
  If l were  you l would change my phone number and obtain new email address.  BE HARD CORE and your next relationship will be more suitable to the way you would like to live. I used to be such a gentleman and never got anywhere with women. When l became older, meaner,  more self centered yet still cater to her needs suddenly l was like a puzzle they all wanted to solve. 
     Have purpose and direction they all love to go on a ride so know where you are going in life ...have a plan and some feline will gravitate to you.
 
Prospect
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Posted: #181
Quote Originally Posted by willneverstop:

imagine being with a broad for 35 yrs and her telling you she wants a divorce. lol, you figure after 3 1/2 decades your in the clear

 
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Posted: #182
Quote Originally Posted by Messier-11:

It's official....I'm a box. I just made a photo album book for her of all our good photos and on the back page wrote a message saying that I'll always love her and that I understand long distance is tough. Maybe change and a fresh start will be a good thing for both of us. You have been my best friend these last 5 years, almost like family. Hopefully one day we can still be friends. I'm not going to say another word from here on out.  I promise.

I know it was said before....But....Lose the avatar!!! Messier would never do that
 
Captain
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Posted: #183
in order-

1- time
2- booze
3- lots of snatch
 
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Posted: #184

about 3 months ago i asked for a layoff from work, about 2 months ago i got a new puppy, about 1 month ago i kicked my girl of 5 years out. the dumb puppy gave me the power to do it.

get a puppy, you'll talk to more "quality bitches" than ever.. a bitch that is out running or walking her god is ten times better than the bitch at the bar. i talk to a few everyday and have gone out with 2 or 3. plus the puppy kills the lonely feeling. best of luck my friend.

never feel sorry for yourself. go to a fucking childrens hospital if need be and walk around.

 
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Posted: #185

*dog not god  3rd line.

 
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Posted: #186

Quote Originally Posted by Messier-11:

Going to get some xanax this afternoon. I'll be fine after that. Shit makes me numb. I'l take that for a few days and watch some comedies. Tossing and turning all night thinking about everything was hell. With a xanax before bed I'll be in a coma. Problem solved....I gotta watch out though and only take it for a little. I really don't want to get hooked on it.

https://youtu.be/GHq87F2fS-s

 
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Posted: #187
Sorry for your pain bro.  Time is the only thing that really helps and it can move really slow sometimes.
 
Captain
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Posted: #188

First off, there are a lot of women in here posing as men. Unreal.

Yep, here comes my tough love approach again. Why? Because its the truth. And times like these require brutal honesty.

Messier, its really simple, are you are box or are you a man?  You will come back to this thread and most likely be embarrassed in the future. Think of this period of time as the last leg of your maturity process. You will be much better off when this all blows over. Stop groveling over someone who doesn't want to be with you. She has measured you up, and has decided you don't meet her measure.  Have some fucking self respect. You are giving this broad all the power over you. Once she gets that pathetic album you sent her, it will be proof positive that she completely owns you. And if she had any doubt about her choice, it will be all cleared up once that album arrives. 

And for christ's sake stop talking to this woman. Shut her the fuck out. All it does is prolong your agony, it is a way for you to delay the inevitable that you fear. She texts you or calls you do not answer. She is still controlling you even after she broke your heart. Pathetic bro. You should be pissed off at this broad. Not trying to win her back.  And stop the psycho analysis bs, you are a man. Remember that. Women want men who don't need them for the most part. You are exhibiting the type of behavior that turns off most women.  Shut this broad out, and go to town on yourself. Be courageous. And understand you are becoming a man.

 BOL   

Also, vegasrebel417 knows of what he speaks. Listen to him.

 

 

 
Captain
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Posted: #189

And yes, I've walked in a mile your shoes before, I think we all have to some extent.

Sounds like you got a lot going for you as well. Chin up, head held high. And try to make that non-gagger gag.

 
Captain
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Posted: #190
My advice:

1. Never try to convince a woman to stay. I treat women with an open door policy. If they want to leave, the door is open. The fact it's open will keep them away from that door.

2. Keep your mind occupied, go out, go out, go out, be active in multiple things such as a new hobby, friends, work, etc.  Take this time to grow so the "next time" she meets you she see's that you weren't a turtle and that you moved on and grew, she will find that attractive, and if not, you will be 10 steps ahead.

3. No point of staying home, gambling extra or doing stupid shit.  Remember this if anything: "The only thing you control in life is your reaction." So I ask you "what's your reaction going to be?"  Are you going to be wimpy and chase her, are you gonna sulk or are going to step it up and become a better person?

People will laugh with this quote, but in the last Rocky movie, Rocky tells his son "In life, it's not how hard you can hit, it's how hard you can get hit, fall down, but get back up that makes a man a real man" ...so with that said, man up, step up and control your reaction. 


 
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Posted: #191
buy a costco sized drum of lubriderm...
 
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Posted: #192
Quote Originally Posted by TILTOLOGIC:

First off, there are a lot of women in here posing as men. Unreal.

Yep, here comes my tough love approach again. Why? Because its the truth. And times like these require brutal honesty.

Messier, its really simple, are you are box or are you a man?  You will come back to this thread and most likely be embarrassed in the future. Think of this period of time as the last leg of your maturity process. You will be much better off when this all blows over. Stop groveling over someone who doesn't want to be with you. She has measured you up, and has decided you don't meet her measure.  Have some fucking self respect. You are giving this broad all the power over you. Once she gets that pathetic album you sent her, it will be proof positive that she completely owns you. And if she had any doubt about her choice, it will be all cleared up once that album arrives. 

And for christ's sake stop talking to this woman. Shut her the fuck out. All it does is prolong your agony, it is a way for you to delay the inevitable that you fear. She texts you or calls you do not answer. She is still controlling you even after she broke your heart. Pathetic bro. You should be pissed off at this broad. Not trying to win her back.  And stop the psycho analysis bs, you are a man. Remember that. Women want men who don't need them for the most part. You are exhibiting the type of behavior that turns off most women.  Shut this broad out, and go to town on yourself. Be courageous. And understand you are becoming a man.

 BOL   

Also, vegasrebel417 knows of what he speaks. Listen to him.

 

 

 
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Posted: #193
Quote Originally Posted by mrbigstuff2466:

Quote Originally Posted by Messier-11:

Ya I'm trying my best. Just sucks sometimes. Mainly right before bed and when I wake up. I think this breakup was the wake up call I needed. I am more motivated then ever at the moment. I've been working out like a mad men and hitting the books hard. If I ever run into her again she'll realize the mistake she made. Until then I can only work on bettering myself and not worrying about things out of my control. Fuck it....time will heal this wound. Thanks for everything guys [/Quot
 Never put a woman on a pedestal because they will trample all over your heart. Stay in control at all times and remember in the end "she" chooses you....You dont choose her. So always be prepared to walk away if need be knowing full well that the next one is around the corner. You are your own woman control center.
  If l were  you l would change my phone number and obtain new email address.  BE HARD CORE and your next relationship will be more suitable to the way you would like to live. I used to be such a gentleman and never got anywhere with women. When l became older, meaner,  more self centered yet still cater to her needs suddenly l was like a puzzle they all wanted to solve. 
     Have purpose and direction they all love to go on a ride so know where you are going in life ...have a plan and some feline will gravitate to you.

I just read the two best respenses for Messier.

THIS IS THE FIRST ONE. Nice going Mr Big!

 
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Posted: #194
Quote Originally Posted by TILTOLOGIC:

First off, there are a lot of women in here posing as men. Unreal.

Yep, here comes my tough love approach again. Why? Because its the truth. And times like these require brutal honesty.

Messier, its really simple, are you are box or are you a man?  You will come back to this thread and most likely be embarrassed in the future. Think of this period of time as the last leg of your maturity process. You will be much better off when this all blows over. Stop groveling over someone who doesn't want to be with you. She has measured you up, and has decided you don't meet her measure.  Have some fucking self respect. You are giving this broad all the power over you. Once she gets that pathetic album you sent her, it will be proof positive that she completely owns you. And if she had any doubt about her choice, it will be all cleared up once that album arrives. 

And for christ's sake stop talking to this woman. Shut her the fuck out. All it does is prolong your agony, it is a way for you to delay the inevitable that you fear. She texts you or calls you do not answer. She is still controlling you even after she broke your heart. Pathetic bro. You should be pissed off at this broad. Not trying to win her back.  And stop the psycho analysis bs, you are a man. Remember that. Women want men who don't need them for the most part. You are exhibiting the type of behavior that turns off most women.  Shut this broad out, and go to town on yourself. Be courageous. And understand you are becoming a man.

 BOL   

Also, vegasrebel417 knows of what he speaks. Listen to him.

 

 

This one rocks as well. Kudos Tilt!

 

 
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Posted: #195
Ya that album arriving on monday will be funny/patheticMaybe it will make her miss me though and she will feel nostalgic. She was always the more lovey dovey one. I hope she misses me and tries to call a few times so I can look at my phone and laugh as I see the missed calls piling up. Wishful thinking, but it would make me feel good. Believe it or not.....I am almost healed. I am catching a red eye and going to Costa Rica tonight. I was there 3 months ago and had a blast. I haven't been on a vacation solo before but I will make the best of it. Party, surf, smoke some pot, bang some hookers, if I don't get lucky with any of the locals. Probably even if  I do get lucky with the locals also.  Fuck it. I will be posted up in a beach front hotel sipping Imperials for the next few weeks. 
 
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Posted: #196
I never got over getting dumped.  And I got dumped a few times.  I miss all of them.  I wish they all lived here with me and layed with me on the couch.
 
Captain
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Posts: 6898
Posted: #197
Quote Originally Posted by TILTOLOGIC:

First off, there are a lot of women in here posing as men. Unreal.

Yep, here comes my tough love approach again. Why? Because its the truth. And times like these require brutal honesty.

Messier, its really simple, are you are box or are you a man?  You will come back to this thread and most likely be embarrassed in the future. Think of this period of time as the last leg of your maturity process. You will be much better off when this all blows over. Stop groveling over someone who doesn't want to be with you. She has measured you up, and has decided you don't meet her measure.  Have some fucking self respect. You are giving this broad all the power over you. Once she gets that pathetic album you sent her, it will be proof positive that she completely owns you. And if she had any doubt about her choice, it will be all cleared up once that album arrives. 

And for christ's sake stop talking to this woman. Shut her the fuck out. All it does is prolong your agony, it is a way for you to delay the inevitable that you fear. She texts you or calls you do not answer. She is still controlling you even after she broke your heart. Pathetic bro. You should be pissed off at this broad. Not trying to win her back.  And stop the psycho analysis bs, you are a man. Remember that. Women want men who don't need them for the most part. You are exhibiting the type of behavior that turns off most women.  Shut this broad out, and go to town on yourself. Be courageous. And understand you are becoming a man.

 BOL   

Also, vegasrebel417 knows of what he speaks. Listen to him.

 

 



POST OF THE DAY
 
Prospect
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Posted: #198
Also buy a slingshot.  Women tend to be attracted to a man who can use a slingshot.  Take it to the bar and some rocks.  Start talking to a woman and right after you say "hey how are you?".....take the slingshot out and say "watch this".  Take the rock out slowly and peg the biggest guy in the room in the head.  Then run.  Next time you see the woman she is putty in your hands.
 
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Posted: #199
Quote Originally Posted by ProtoStar:

Also buy a slingshot.  Women tend to be attracted to a man who can use a slingshot.  Take it to the bar and some rocks.  Start talking to a woman and right after you say "hey how are you?".....take the slingshot out and say "watch this".  Take the rock out slowly and peg the biggest guy in the room in the head.  Then run.  Next time you see the woman she is putty in your hands.
 
 
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Posted: #200
I won a lot of money gambling these last few weeks. It all started with a 9 team parlay that won me 10 grand two weeks ago in baseball that i posted. Then I put 7 of that on the bruins game 3 and some game 4. I've gave back some the last few days though. I think I'm going to just cash out my winnings and let them fuel the party for a while. Gambling is too much stress and time consumed. I am 100% in the red over my career and I've nad multiple 10-20 grand parlay wins. I won 12 grand on a 12 team nfl parlay my freshman year of college and lost 7 grand of it that night in online poker. I am consumed by this shit . My relationship probably failed bc of it. I had to watch the games I had action on and that got in the way of school, work, family, friends, girlfriends. A few tears ago out of nowhere I came down with Acid Reflux. Have had it bad ever since. No doubt in my mind it is from the stress gambling has caused. Whether its a tie game coming down to the last shot or owing a bookie a lot of money you didn't have. If I continue do gamble my life will be worse then what It could be if I utilized all the time and effort spent on gambling on productive stuff. I'm lucky I'm still young bc with my gambling addiction I would've pissed away my life savings, house, you name it. I'm getting out know while I still can and ending on a somewhat positive note. No....this isn't one of those see you tomorrow type things. Football season will be tough to avoid though I must admit. Maybe I'll tell myself that I'll start with a small bankroll and use money management and do it just for fun and try and hit a long shot parlay. We all know what that will turn into though. I don't have the self control. I lost 3 grand on miami 1st quarter tonight. I don't value my money when its in my sportsbook online one bit. Thanks for all the advice guys. I'm taking a nice vacation and when I get back putting all my effort in getting my life back on track in the direction I always envisioned it. Normal life. Wife, kids, stable job, nice house with a big yard, dogs, etc. I won't be able to accomplish these dreams with gambling in my life. I tip my hat to those of you that can gamble and not let it affect your other parts of life. However, I know I cannot. This breakup was a wakeup call and I examined everything I don't like about myself and this was high up on the list. I'm sure I'll stop by the general discussion board and others here and there but my gambling days are done.  I wish you guys all good luck though with this hobby. 

Cya around.......Mess




cliffnotes.....I'm a big box. I quit gambling. I am going another direction with my life and hopefully things work out.

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