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Moving to Vegas to become a full time pro handicapper

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MVP
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Joined: Jul, 2006
Posts: 19693
Posted: #11401
Max, for a numbers guy, you gotta way with words! Hysterical!

If I may:

Handicapping - Looking at the sportspage in the newspaper having coffee after breakfast.

Grind - What you do to a MILF

Bankroll - C notes held together by a rubber bound in a circular fashion

Money Management - See Above

Line Shopping - Making sure you get the very best cocaine. See "mojo"

Queens - Possible relocation area for the CG, or what a certain NBA Sacramento team turns CGs testicles into.

Max, I may have more, I may not. But you can never top the original. Much respect

Bomb - What CG is doing at betting................
 
Banned
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Joined: Sep, 2006
Posts: 28221
Posted: #11402
Quote Originally Posted by Bermax:

College gambler pocket dictionary.

Grind - throwing three 3K mini bombs in quick succession.

Discipline - "grinding" instead of throwing 10K bomb.

Humbled - a state of mind of deep introspection where no further bombs are thrown. Mean duration 22.6 minutes.

Handicapping - identifying value on one side, fading yourself just because.

Wholesome fun - DUI to MILF

Bankroll - a pile of crisp C notes, primarily used for buying blow/filling up sonata/shopping for tilapia. Occasionally used for "grinding".

Money management - increase stakes when bankroll shrinks, like a "pro/boss/legend"

Pro/Boss/Legend - an NCAA/NBA/NHL/MLB bettor with a proven record in the NFL.

Family - synonymous with "bad luck"

Bad luck - every time a bet doesn't win.

Sickening - see "bad luck"

Line shopping - doing miles in a hyundai sonata.

Snap - word used at end of agitated YouTube videos. Meaning unclear.

Mojo - something that gets lost when "family" comes to town.

Tall Boys/TBs - increases "mojo"

Sacramento Kings - goto NBA team when the "proven" "pro/boss/legend" is "handicapping"

Advice - no dictionary entry

Definitive proof someone read and understood the intricacies of all 11,600 posts
 
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Posts: 3051
Posted: #11403

Quote Originally Posted by cd329:



To be totally honest not long at all.  As good as i was that year, the next year the games didnt fall the same way.
35 years of chasing the golden goose in gambling and still havent found him.  So much time and money wasted away.

Yeah....it seems like when you have the goose by the neck, he bites your fingers off.

I ran hot for awhile when I was younger.....thought I was the man. Then placed the largest wager of my life (it still is, for whatever that is worth)...NCAA football.....BYU at TCU. BYU was even money; I jumped on it.  Got blown out in every way possible. That one hurt.....still think about it. 

At the end of the day, it is the time spent on this stuff that hurts...money comes and goes....time just goes.

Never Make A Winner A Loser. Never.
 
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Joined: Oct, 2014
Posts: 2042
Posted: #11404
I have followed this thread since it first started.  It started out with a guy wanting to be a professional gambler and turned into a guy who decided being on an extended vacation was more fun.
 
Veteran
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Posts: 2042
Posted: #11405
"What happens in Vegas"...........sports gambling......."stays in Vegas"..............CG's money.
 
MVP
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Posts: 18584
Posted: #11406
CG like many have suggested, a quick drive to LA and spending the weekend on the beach to clear your head is your best bet.
 
Rookie
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Joined: Apr, 2014
Posts: 949
Posted: #11407
Quote Originally Posted by Theone324:

CG like many have suggested, a quick drive to LA and spending the weekend on the beach to clear your head is your best bet.

 
Legend
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Joined: Nov, 2001
Posts: 60107
Posted: #11408

Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

I am a very sick, disturbed person.. went to bed at 9pm last night had all kinds of weird dreams.. I need help bad.. I want to grind but I just cant... u know what is coming today

Call your family and tell them this.  They will help you.

Support your local animal shelter. I am on twitter.
 
Legend
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Joined: Nov, 2001
Posts: 60107
Posted: #11409

CG - how about not grinding today.  How about doing nothing today?

There is nothing special about today.

Go see the grand canyon, or drive somewhere outside of Nevada today.  There is nothing today that wont be there on Monday.  Sweat it out.

Come on.

Support your local animal shelter. I am on twitter.
 
All-Star
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Joined: Sep, 2010
Posts: 12241
Posted: #11410
Just go home dude before you go broke man seriously.
 
Captain
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Joined: Feb, 2008
Posts: 9021
Posted: #11411
More losing bets??

Mix thing up a bit.
 
Banned
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Joined: Dec, 2004
Posts: 14064
Posted: #11412
Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

Going to gym then Wells Fargo to release the bomb it's an afternoon game too

"The CG" continues on his "journey" where Vegas transforms him from a humble Jersey kid into a madman action bomb dropping junkie.

Let us all bow our heads for a moment of silence and respect for his bankroll.


Now...

On to the 401k.

47k worth of power packed TNT with the bomb potential to change the world, bahhhhhhhhhhhhbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

PM for the skinny on the down low
 
Captain
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Posts: 7891
Posted: #11413
Quote Originally Posted by Theone324:

CG like many have suggested, a quick drive to LA and spending the weekend on the beach to clear your head is your best bet.


As far as his gambling habits go, there is nothing anyone can say to change the path he's on.  He's not listening and he is destined to be broke, that's it.  Been there, done that.  I'm sure a lot of us have.  Maybe not to this extent, but still.  So many times he has given himself good advice, and actually verbalized what he needs to do to change things, and he reverts back to the compulsive gambler habits.  Here is an interesting read on why some compulsive gamblers subconsciously want to lose.

https://www.whywesuffer.com/problem-gamblers-are-addicted-to-losing/

As far as what other help might get his head straight or put him on a better path, who knows.  Help is only useful if a person is willing to accept it.  

 
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Posted: #11414
Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

how does my 401K work does anyone know?  two more losses and im bankrupt....

if I take out like 10K how much do I get taxed?


A quick internet search provided much help for "The CG".

https://www.bankonyourself.com/401k-withdrawal-rules

I believe that you could withdraw the funds under the "Hardship" provision as it certainly appears as though you would be losing your primary domicile should you not have enough money to pay your rent when it comes due in June.

Please check with a local tax advisor.

PM for the skinny on the down low
 
Captain
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Posts: 6667
Posted: #11415
It's tax and penalties. Get a job, you owe it to yourself. You don't owe us anything. 
 
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Posted: #11416
After reading further, I am even more certain that you could remove the funds penalty free under the "Qualifying Disability" section.

"Gambling Addiction" is an actual diagnosis similar to "Alcoholic Addiction" that should work so you can take it all out with no penalty.

As always, please check with a local tax adviser.

PM for the skinny on the down low
 
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Posts: 949
Posted: #11417
Good share bk1374.  I was thinking about the idea posed in that link when CG put in that under bet yesterday.  When I have tilted bad in the past I would also play unders I didn't really believe would hit, and those were the times I would start to think that I'm really trying to lose, to get to the bottom of my sickness.  

Because there is no sicker feeling psychologically than the kind of beat CG set himself up for yesterday.  I know the feeling because I've done it myself several times. 

And I couldn't bet my way out of it.  Have to take a break, even if it's just one day.  

STAY AWAY FOR A DAY CG.  
 
All-Star
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Posts: 12670
Posted: #11418
Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

how does my 401K work does anyone know?  two more losses and im bankrupt....

if I take out like 10K how much do I get taxed?

 
Legend
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Joined: Nov, 2001
Posts: 60107
Posted: #11419
Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

how does my 401K work does anyone know?  two more losses and im bankrupt....

if I take out like 10K how much do I get taxed?

10% immediate penalty.

On top of the penalty, the money counts as income for this tax year.

So if you take out 10k, you will pay 1k, and then you will pay whatever your income taxes are for next year on the additional 10k.

Support your local animal shelter. I am on twitter.
 
Captain
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Posts: 7891
Posted: #11420
Quote Originally Posted by collegegambler:

how does my 401K work does anyone know?  two more losses and im bankrupt....

if I take out like 10K how much do I get taxed?


Probably depends on who it's with. But I am SURE you will have to pay taxes on it to the IRS, since it likely went into your 401k before taxes.  

See if you can take out a loan against it.  My 401k provided lets me take a fairly low interest loan (4.25%) out against it with ZERO penalties a minimal fees ($75).  Then it's paid back every pay check for whatever term you agree to.  But, that might only be an option because I am still employed with the company that has the relationship with my 401k provider.  You'll need to contact them directly for details, and contact a tax accountant too, if you have one.

For the record, this is a BAD idea.  Getting a JOB should be way higher up on the "to do" list if you go broke.  But, whatever...lol.

Here is what my site said regarding a straight withdrawal (i.e. not a loan, and not a hardship withdrawal)

20% of your withdrawal may be withheld for federal income taxes, and the entire taxable amount will be considered ordinary income for the current tax year (unless you roll it over yourself).

If you are not yet 59 ½ (and don't rollover the withdrawal) you may be subject to an additional 10% penalty on the entire taxable portion of your withdrawal. This information has been provided for your benefit and is not intended or designed to be tax advice. Consult your individual tax adviser with any specific questions.

 
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Posted: #11421
Quote Originally Posted by smacksmiter:

After reading further, I am even more certain that you could remove the funds penalty free under the "Qualifying Disability" section.

"Gambling Addiction" is an actual diagnosis similar to "Alcoholic Addiction" that should work so you can take it all out with no penalty.

As always, please check with a local tax adviser.

Throwing gas on the fire?

Never Make A Winner A Loser. Never.
 
Legend
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Joined: Nov, 2001
Posts: 60107
Posted: #11422

Holy shi t.

CG has many options:

A.  Get a job
B.  Go back home
C.  Take the weekend off, see how things look on Monday
D.  Drop more bomb plays on afternoon baseball, and take money out of 401k.

I love how his default go to option is D right off the bat.

Sickness.  Total sickness.  You are not a professional gambler - you are in need of help.  Reach out to your family.

Support your local animal shelter. I am on twitter.
 
Prospect
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Joined: Feb, 2015
Posts: 95
Posted: #11423
CG

For your own sake, I actually hope you lose.  Losing at this point would be better for you than winning, because either way, with the path you are going down, you will lose it all eventually.  That means if you lose tonight, you will NEED to go out and seek help considering you would be down to 0.

So honestly tonight you're actually better off losing IMO.

GL

 
Prospect
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Joined: Feb, 2015
Posts: 95
Posted: #11424
CG

For your own sake, I actually hope you lose.  Losing at this point would be better for you than winning, because either way, with the path you are going down, you will lose it all eventually.  That means if you lose tonight, you will NEED to go out and seek help considering you would be down to 0.

So honestly tonight you're actually better off losing IMO.

GL

 
 
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Joined: Sep, 2010
Posts: 12241
Posted: #11425
Getting a job or going home are by far your best options at this point man.
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