I literally have no clue why they put me in covers prison.

Who is “us” and “we”

So you say....You're Clueless?

Damn bro,  we're losing another good capper

Hey yo JimmyGape is like that kid from your high school who told you that over the summer he won a surfing contest in Maui , when he’s never even been out of Queens , and even damn near died drowning at the public pool , that lost his big titted girlfriend over the whole fiasco because she was so embarrassed about it  

Did he at least look like a surfer? If he looked the part, it's kind of a G move until people find out you can't even swim. It's probably the reason he had the hot girlfriend in the first place. What ever happened to her? Married a cop? Three shitty kids? Heroin?

Lmfao

yeah he kinda looked the part . He was one of the well to do kids that lived in the affluent neighborhood far away from the vagabonds and miscreants that circled around like buzzards on the downtrodden landscape where a lot of our collection of neer’do well friends grew up .

But I guess we were all a mish mash of human gumbo cuz you had every kind of motherfucker that God created up in that piece . The geography of the area permitted that . It was a recipe for both disaster and fundamental learning on a great level because of it . You learned about ALL kinds of people . So nothing was left for one to infer or stereotype because it cold cocked you in the mouth on the daily . That reality stimulus brother . Better than any drug ever invented …..

but back to that bogus fake ass wannabe surfer “ Mike “ . Fuck Mike .

Yo homeboy had a nice ride and yes he had the big titty girlfriend always riding shotgun in the passenger seat that would manipulate his genitals as he drove cuz as he stated so often “ I needs that kind of attention “ but my boy was odd as fuck with his incessant lying , not too mention the rocking of that 3 stooges “ Shemp” haircut , only it was blonde and longer ……

I swear dude had a fibbing problem , and most of the time I knew he wasn’t coming correct , because he had a significant “ tell “ or “ pantomime “ , because he would flick those golden locks out of his eyes with his well manicured and never done a day of work in his life fingers while looking at the sky , and he’d give himself away ……

hey I ain’t hatin’ on the motherfucker , he was alright , plus he had the big titty girlfriend , so he got points with me , but reserve all the bullshit stories for the gullible and naive scrotes that don’t know no better than to believe that bullshit ya heard ?

it’s one thing to have a little fun and embellish some details here and there in the name of fucking around but when push comes to shove and you’re staring at me eye to eye trying to play me like a fool on some ridiculous cockamamie bullshit for no other reason than to make yourself feel better or to disrespect my  intelligence than I’m pulling your “ G “ card , and now it ain’t yours no more , plus I’m groping your lady in the Locker room after she followed me in there during the school dance cuz I was looking at her all night …..

he was a nice kid though . But he wasn’t no surfer 

and the big titty girlfriend ? Damn . Two guys on the baseball team banged her and “ fucked her with a pants belt “ cuz she asked them to , whatever that means . The story got around . She got embarrassed . She moved to Florida and became a stripper . She died in a car accident 3 years later . Rest In Peace Alisha .

@spockgato

 Jesus. Feels like that is a true story 

it’s true 

and Lou Albano could talk that game . 

The Rubber Band Prince

Is that Starwink....