DJ BROW

DJ won't see this for a few days. He is still busy running around Minny setting cars on fire and breaking store windows in celebration of yesterdays Vikings win

If Alanis Morisette was here I’d ask her if she really did fuck Uncle Joey from Full House , and also that if she thought DJ , not the goofy chick from the show , but the man of the law here at covers committing crimes in real life , was a bit ironic , dontcha think ?

I can just picture it now , DJ Brow in his covers hat and referee uniform doing the Gritty all the way up and down Chicago Ave. only stopping to piss in any gas tank where the car doesn’t have a a Vikings sticker somewhere on the bumper or window …..

All right that might be a stretch like a dive at the pylon for a TD , but tell me you couldn’t envision him celebrating with friends afterward by taking a big hit off of a 3 foot purple bong with a Kirk Cousin’s “ You like That ! “ sticker christening it’s exterior while wearing a horned helmet and smiling his ass off like all 3 Kardashian sisters were pleasuring him at the same time…..Lamar Odom’s ex girlfriend with her tongue in his butt ……

while we are on the subject , irony , not rim jobs , don’t you feel it’s like the bizarro world how restraining orders can be issued AGAINST the person defending themselves due to the continued false labeling of being called a racist , bigot , and rapist ?

is that what the world has become ?

Sure , pissing in someone’s gas tank will probably affect the mileage and possibly be detrimental to the environment by interfering with its normal emissions but that is nothing compared to the absolute cowardice that defaming someone’s character is …..

just ask that hooker ex wife of Johnny Depp …

Or you could just get an electric car and be on your way …..

but throwing out a whole bunch of bullshit , and hoping some of it sticks , while the truth gets caught in the shuffle of absurdity , and attacking a man’s integrity by way of some pusssy shit is just plain wrong …..

don’t you agree ?

GFY

Ben , there you Ho again 

always with your insightful banter , painting a Sistine Chapel-esque masterpiece across this site’s bandwidth time after time …..

you’re the Cyndi Lauper of the watercolor paint by numbers generic acronym movement ….

kudos to you my friend ……

I can only imagine what works of art you are making inside your underwear with your stellar use of the oft disregarded browns and yellows that so many in the painting community find boorish and passé…..

I know that there is a harsh stereotype given to the creatively gifted calling them “ starving artists “ but the good news is as long as you eat and drink just enough you will always have the materials needed to make another magnum opus…..

oh you’re pissed cuz you don’t have a magnum ?

well , that’s easy , after using the kettle bell and elliptical for 5 minutes each don’t take a shower and risk embarrassment by using the gym’s available showers ….. just get directly into your VW beetle , go home and put on Giada De Laurentis on the Food Channel and learn how to make us some croissants , or anything as buttery and flaky as you are  , forgoing the shower , cuz you ain’t gettin’ laid anyway partner 

not if you have an attitude like that …..

Boss come into your office breathing down your neck about the Penske file or somethin’ ?

and you been spending all week sleeping under your desk instead of working ?

ain’t my problem Buckaroo Banzai …..

what are you mad about ?

Nacional Potosi drawing last night in the Bolivian Primera Division ?

we’ll just like their opponent from last night’s game I’m Always Ready to find out what the problem is and get down to a speedy and final resolution ……

so what is it big guy ? Fish weren’t bitin’ by the water today or the club last night either ?

well , don’t take it out on me …..

you gotta release some tension , and if you do got a lady in your life , and she checks your browser history making porn “ a no go “ for you , well , then , try Cinemax around 3 AM …….I hear the Emmanuelle movies are amazing , and might just cumm in handy …..

J-Roc!

RIP Philadelphia 

Why all the hostilities brother ? I had nothing to do with the Golden Corral closing down in your town . da fuck ? you and your family can just go to some other place to eat . man , this is getting embarrassing . it’s not like you even pay like a regular customer does . you just go into the back alley behind the “ restaurant “ where the dumpster is , take off your members only jacket , and stuff half eaten ribs and stained chocolate sauce napkins into the arm slots . did I kick you out of your wheelchair or something ? did I start making out with some chick you brought to a rock concert back in the day and leave with her halfway through the opening act ? I don’t get it , you’re acting like I served you a bowl of expired milk and stale Cinnamon Toast Crunch in your mother’s bedpan …..now , we ain’t gotta be friends or chummy , and get 9 rounds in on Sundays before football starts , while we talk about taxes and lower back pain all the while salivating over the girl caddies but we ain’t gotta be subzero vs scorpion either ……

you miss a pill ? either birth control or anti-depressant or something ?

what gives ?

besides me …… in respect to the numerous thrashings I dole out like heaping helpings of go fuck yourself sandwiches to every uptight buttplug on this motherfucking site ……

that nerdy brent musberger included ……

BAMMMMMMM!!!!!

Does that shit still come on Sninemax late night? Taking me back to childhood.

Plenty of the usernames in this thread are the same person ...

I actually feel bad for whatever human operates them all ...Clearly has some serious issues ...Prayers ..

Emmanuelle In Space.

Better than The Godfather trilogy

Emmanuelle in Space

Alien encounters  , odd creatures , mind bending sexual perversions , betrayal , lust , a hot slutty minx always down to bend over and gratify everyone’s deepest , darkest , most depraved desires……

sounds like some people in this thread to me , guess you don’t have to stay up till 3 in the morning and have a subscription to Cinemax after all …..

all you really need is an internet connection and a login password to covers.com to enjoy that little part of your mind that gravitates towards the titillating…..

Is covers streaming on Netflix this month ? 

cuz this shit right here is some nice entertainment , “ lifers “ writing in fear , and like mice , running from my light , frightened and aimless ……

I might miss but my aim’s quick…..

so they can scurry and dart ……

to some safer regions ……

cuz sooner or later I’ll turn exterminator and behave worse , to the fake sirs …you can believe it ……

In my best bug eyed , gaunt faced Al Pacino , with the over acting on full display …..

” I tried to get out but they pulled me back in “

how many must perish and fall like that grand temptress of potato noses Sofia Coppola ?

but I’ll have more than one of you guys with that shocked face looking for assistance and murmuring more than just “ Dad….”

There will be a long “ the new rollercoaster just opened at 6 Flags “ line up of people in your Rolodex of help that you’ll be calling out for ….

uncles , friends , your bartender , the ghost of Mother Teresa , your idol Billie Jean King , Superman , the Flash , etc etc  ……you motherfuckers are gonna need a whole army to deal with me……

when I’m done with you , you guys won’t be playing basketball in Pelican Bay , you’ll be writing 3 page novels asking for forgiveness , Jake ! Imma put cases on all you motherfuckers ! Jake ! but I ain’t goin’ out like Denzel in that movie , I’m goin’ out like him in real life , gettin’ awards and shit , held in the highest regard and what not , Jake ! counseling Will Smith on his next public blunder cuz ….

King Kong Ain’t Got Shit on Me ……

sooner or later one of these pipsqueaks gotta step up and say what the problem is …..

and none of that bullshit made up stuff either like SingleAndLonely4Infinity likes to spew…..

You guys gonna step up to the plate and air your grievances ? or do I have to put up the metal pole first ?

I don't know, man. I only remember Emmanuelle being in old times France or some shit. Not exploring the cosmos.

Plus the the first two Godfather's were fucking Masterpieces. The third was cheeks but the first two, given the source material, are cinematic marvels. Even better than the source material, which spent too much time on the chick with the giant hoo ha. I prefer the chronological cuts, as I can kinda tap out after the move to Nevada.

Even when spock isn't rapping, his shit is like spoken word.

@StumpTownStu

 rap game johnny cash