Beep-Beep-Hugh Jorgan-Beep-Are You Receiving Transmissions?

Get in here!  I’ve still have custody of a filthy couch you sent me.

It ain’t getting any prettier.

Clean it you lazy bum. 

@Cranky_Hank

 Sniffer,,,,,,

Hugh Jorgan, 

Is there any way we can tell Bigred he really won the NFL Playoff Contest , it was actually stolen from him , and get this f*cking sofa returned to him?

It's your nicest piece cocksniffer......

And speaking of spirits in the sky, Poo, could you please pull some strings for me when i back your stinking arse Mets.Thanks in advance buddy. 

No..No..No.  

First you work that Red Whale with a box of Clorax Wipes,then you get a spray bottle of Lysol and FaBreeze and work about 6 rounds with that Worm.Once it drys you Simonize the piss out of it and No-Rust undercoat it.Then you will have something worthy of perching on the high-ground of your front lawn.

TW might be able to fit it in the igloo. 

2 Gas Cans....

People are saying it's gonna be a tough year for the Dallas Cowboys, i have not checked out any teams yet but plan on taking a gander this week end. 

Dallas was 12-5 last year.  +125 point differential.

To put that in perspective, the Chiefs were +127, and the Eagles +133.  Only the Bills and Niners were higher.

Zack Martin situation needs to play out.  

Brandin Cooks signing is way better than I feel like people are giving it credit for.

Stephon Gilmore as well..........

I think Deuce Vaughn from K State will be a nice backup RB for them assuming he makes the team......I don't think they will miss Zeke

I am no Cowboy fan or hater.......but the team is solid and may be getting just a little overlooked because of how last year played out with Dak being injured for awhile, ......but they went 4-1 without Dak.........the team has good bones.......I don't see how they aren't in most games competitively......

@JDD

 Being a Ravens fan i would have preferred Cooks over OBJ and i think Vaughn is gonna be a baller. Just going off memory i think it would behoove the Cowboys if the D could get off the field a tad sooner more often, but hell i guess one could say that about most teams.

@Biscuiteater1

 I agree with you 100000000% about Cooks vs OBJ.  

Cooks is one of the best values at WR in my opinion

Such a team friendly deal for a guy with six - 1,000 yard seasons who has sometimes played with real question marks at QB.

If I read it properly the Cowboys only pay him $4M guaranteed this season, and next year none of the $8M is guaranteed 

I have watched a lot of this guy, especially 2 years ago when I first got the A22 subscription, when Mills was his QB and there were a lot of games that I was waiting for Houston to go up at all so I could grab a shorter line and fade them,,,,,,,,,,that season Houston would just give up on plays constantly.....when you watch that A22 afterwards it is no surprise they fired Culley. Embarrassing. Cooks is an excellent route runner, and really strong hands. Guy goes up and gets it in traffic, I honestly cannot say enough good things about him and I think Dallas got a total fucking steal.  Another sneaky 1000 yard season would not surprise me.  If Gallup stays healthy they could have a good quick passing game

I am a die-hard Cowboys fan and have been following close. The offensive line will have issues regardless of Zack being a part of the team and could ultimately be the achilles heal of the team. The defense looks great on paper. For the first time in like two decades I can say the secondary looks stacked. The front will get pressure. The linebacker corp has questions depending on if you consider Micah a true LB or an Edge. I'm hoping for a good year out of LVE. He will become out new Sean Lee. Quarterbacking the whole thing even if his body isn't as explosive as it once was. I really like our youth and the position though.

Offensively, our receiver group is deep now. What a difference a Cooks makes. Last year, at times, it felt it was just CeeDee and nobody. This year we have the veteran speedster at no. 2, dropping Gallup, who should be closer to his pre-injury self. I believe one of the kids being those three will also have a break out year. I think we've got a good enough mix in the backfield as well. Vaughn will probably make the team. He's shown the ability to catch the ball out of the backfield and he's obviously shifty but right now Rico Dowdle is getting the buzz as the no. 2 guy.

That offensive line though... Tyron is old. Tyler should be the starting left tackle but if Tyler is at tackle, and Zack is not there, we have literally zero guards. All the backups are trash. We have no depth. If Tyron can stay healthy and be some semblance of himself, if Zack plays, the starting 5 are solid but there's zero depth. And you need depth on the lines. Especially when you have two old guys and a right tackle coming off injury.

And those damn Eagles just don't skip a beat. They're just a well run franchise. I love the addition of Jalen Carter and Nolan Smith. I love their entire draft. The pick a guy like Tyler Steen in the third round. We grab an injured TE in the first. Don't get me wrong, I liked a some of our picks as well but a guy like Steen would probably be penciled in as a started on our line.

@StumpTownStu

 Yeah. Those Eagles look deep too.  

I feel like I have read a lot of opinions that they will have some regression this season but I don't see it.  If anything Hurts will be 1 year older, and in QB years for these smarter better QBs the game starts really slowing down for them.  It would surprise the shit out of me if they weren't about the same as last season.  Sure they lost the OC to Indy, but Brian Johnson has been there and knows Hurts well.  The guy Desai came most recently from Pete Carroll..........he will be fine..,,,,,,,,,,plus look at all the fucking toys he has to play with lol.  

Your line could be a problem for sure.  Maybe they take a flyer on Rodger Saffold, or Dalton Risner if they are still free agents.  Saffold will probably sign with someone.  Seems like a Cowboys move lol.  There are a couple decent centers out there too from what I am seeing. Rod Hudson, Austin Blythe, Ben Jones......maybe one can move to guard.  Tackle is the toughest one to find........they really should have gone after Mike Mcglinchey but the niners stole him

@JDD

 That's the thing. The Cowboys management didn't think it had issues at guard. Zack Martin is one of the best if not the best guards in the league. And Tyler Smith is really good. He showed his versatility when thrust into the role of left tackle but he was actually drafted to be a guard. So they though they were set at the position even if the did lack depth. The reality is Tyron Smith is old and beat up. I hope he has a good year and is a version of his former self but he has been able to stay on the field in recent years. I don't why the team thinks that will change. I think that during exit interviews they should've sat him down and told them that at this point in his career, they see him as more of a depth piece and that they are moving forward with young Tyler. And this Zack Martin thing came out of no where. Or maybe it didn't. Obviously I have no way of knowing. He was under contract though and this is a real chicken shit move. It's a steep drop down from the starting 5 though. There's no clear cut guy who is behind Zack Martin.

I believe that Dak led the NFL in interceptions last year. So with out him...ah makes sense.

The thing with Martin is.   And this isn’t a racial thing.  He’s made roughly 60 mil over his career.  He spends nothing and lives an easy life.  No lambos.  No popping bottles in the club.  No baby mamas.  The fines he’s incurred are nothing for him.  If he gets paid.  Great.  If he doesn’t he’s ok with that too.  As for the team it obviously hurts tremendously.   But he will not cave.   Without him we are gonna be so reliant on Dak and we know when that happens it’s never a good omen.  The stats on games won when Dak has to throw 30+ times is staggering compared to when he only has to throw 25 or less times.  

The only thing that would make this less racist is if you didn't say, "And this isn't a racial thing" first. 

@StumpTownStu

 
what’s funny is.   This exact quote came from Jesse Holley today.  Who is a black man.  Former cowboy.   

Though early ( 7th week) i think their bye comes at an optimal time, right after road games @ San Fran and Chargers which will give them time to ponder.