Quick....let me head for higher ground. I ain't in no mood for 390 pounds of a shitslide gettin' all over me.
Sump'um like 'at be all I needs.
Hey, I honest to God had a drunk lady shit all over me and my bed one time. We were both drunk, and I had just picked her up, took 'er home, we done our thing, and both passed out for the night.
Woke up the next mornin' feelin' something wet and sticky under the covers, raised them and looked at my hands, and YEEEEEW WEEEEE!! SHIT....EVERYWHERE....All over my legs and backside, 2 inches deep and watery.
Well, I done what any norman full-growed man might do, I ran for the bathroom, throwing up all the way, and jumped in my shower.
I guess my lover for the night awoke at all my machinations in great wonderment and ponder.
Course....I didn't wait around to see, I hightailed it downstairs to drown out the smell (in my mind still) with some 102 proof Wild Turkey, with some 102 proof Fighting Cock, for chasers.
The little lady, in her great embarrassment, bundled up all the bedclothes, and ran lickety-split for the laundry room, bareass and all, dribbling drops of brown liquid all the way, I might add.
Suffice it to say, I never asked for her phone number. Found out later that she was a purebred alcoholic and in a bad way. I sure couldn't tell the night I picked her up though, as she was my fair princess for the evening and I was teetotally sockered. TRUE STORY, I laugh at myself everytime I think about it.
GO FIGURE!! How many here can actually say that they've been
shit on, by a good-looking woman at that, without going into any kinky or sicko kinda connatations? Not many, I bet....heh heh heh
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