Posted:
#1
I have been a Pittsburgh Pirates season ticket holder for four years now. Prices have skyrocketed from the time that they stunk (when I bought them) to where they are consistent contenders.
Here are my major beefs, and why I really just can't stand attending live games anymore.
1. The T-shirt/hot dog toss.
This happens at every ballpark in every state that Major League ball is played. It's not the actual cheap, piece of s**t fabric that has a huge sponsor splattered on the back of a cheaply designed shirt that has your team's name on it. It's the savages, the ruthless lunatics that fight tooth and nail to get that shirt, whether it be pushing you, her, him or that little boy over to get that cheaply designed shirt. As if they wrapped these shirts with dead presidents, these people claw, push, fight, dive, slap and scream for them. Why? Why fight for something that cost an 11-year old Korean kid 20 cents to make?????
2. The fight for a foul ball.
Again, a ball that could be bought at Wal-Mart for 10 bucks is sought after like it was the lost arc, and this is your ONE chance to look at it. I had brought my girlfriend to the game Friday (vs. Nationals) and she was kicked in the head by some kid who was being held by his dad literally over her head just so Starling Marte could throw a ball THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE BECAUSE GREGORY POLANCO ALL THE WAY IN RIGHT F**KING FIELD CAUGHT IT!!!!! I get it, you want your son to have his first ball at a game, but to blatantly invade other peoples space, and to act like a girl pisssing herself because the Beatles are at Shea is just uncalled for.
3. The absolute stupidity of your one-timer fans.
These are the fans that come to that one game on the year. They blow the wad to sit in the good seats to enjoy a good...what sport is this again? Problem here is, this happens every game because I sit in the broker seats area. You got just a few consistent season tix holders and the rest are one-and-doners. I've heard it all. They call Jung-Ho Kang everything but a Korean (Chinese, Filipino, Japanese and one time milato,) they think Pirates from 5-7 years ago still play on the team, they talk about how bad this player is on a 3 for 4 night because he struck out, embarrassing strategy, stupid references. Makes you want to scream.
4. The drunk kids/men/yinzerellas.
Seems like one in three games you either get a group of kids, old ass men or a woman/en that are completely blasted off their rocker, make total fools of themselves, stumble, invade personal space, knock shitt over, annoy you, talk to you, the nine. Guy next to me had beer dumped on him during the Cardinals series (think Friday night) and he got tossed with the drunk dude that dumped it on him for yelling and pushing the guy. I mean what would you do if somebody dumped an entire cup on your head? Don't understand the idea of getting black out drunk if you are paying that money to watch something you hope to remember.
5. The smell.
People stink. Not always fat folk, your stereotypical drunk yinzer or what have you. Sometimes it's women, kids, whatever, I've smelt some of the worst. People that smell like they straight up pooped themselves and didn't even care to clean up. I've seen some of these stinkers gag an entire section. Seems to be a becoming trend of late too...
6. Kids.
Once again, I get it...you parents love to bring your kids to events. Cool, but control the little f**kers at the same time. Parents that just have no regard for anyone around them allow their kids to act like total f**king asssholes during the course of a game. The crying, screaming, incidental kicking, hitting, spitting. If your kid is not ready to attend a game and be an actual spectator, then f**k off until the kid is. You are ruining the game for people that want to watch.
7. The prices.
I sneak my beers in on my waistline. I also don't pay for parking...ever. Still, I am paying almost double for my season tix now from my original contract. And then add on the playoff tix package and the food that you inevitably buy and you are burning one serious hole. What's the point anymore? Unless you have money on the game and you break even on a winning bet compared to cost of attendance, it really stands at a loss. I am really becoming one of those cynical asssholes that think about all the money I spend on the organization, and thinking about how I cheer for dudes that are multi-millionaires; and who wouldn't pay a dime for my bills if I ever lost my job (reference the Mickey Mantle quote from A Bronx Tale.)
NOTE: These one-and-doners have it the worst! My seats on average cost about $130-150 per seat on Stubhub. So you are paying 3-5 to sometimes 6 to attend a game with family, and then you get a beer and food and parking!?!?!?!?! AAHHHHHHH!!
8. The crowds/traffic.
I don't know about your city, but Pittsburgh is a f**king nightmare to access. I imagine normal Pitt congestion is the blueprints in which Hollywood goes about using to show us cities panicked by zombies, natural disasters or asteroids. Add no public transportation, constant summertime construction, and a poorly designed city grid and you got a time-consuming mess on your hands. I have to take a massive loop around the city just to park a mile from the stadium. I live 3.5 miles from PNC Park, which takes about 11 minutes to get to w/o traffic. An average Fri/Sat game it takes me roughly 35-45 minutes to get there. Sunday about 30 min. The f**k?
9. No perks as a season tix holder.
Thousands of dollars given to the organization and I don't get s**t. No more batting practice, no field days, no nothing. No perks at all. You are treated like the other sardines that cram into the park. Sure you get your playoff tix, but at a very expensive cost. My season tix rep doesn't even know who the f**k I am after three years. Really no benefit other than selling the tix for profit on sites like Stubhub (but then STHB smokes your asss with their 15% seller costs, and then the 20% buyer costs which raises the price for them, lowers it for you.)
10. So what's the point?
Lots of b**tching here, but a lot of it justified. Between the people, the smells, the costs, the traffic, the lack of respect and so on, is there really any point to attend live games anymore? Is it worth it? Isn't it better just to enjoy the game from home?????
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