how to handle punk behind kids

I am at a loss as to how to handle neighborhood kids that throw my trash cans all over the place.

I know that I sould like Craig from the movie Friday or a cratchety old man terrorizing the neighborhood kids, but this type of stuff pisses me off.

Today I hear a group of them walking down my back alley and I look outside and one of them takes my trash can and tosses it into the middle of the alley.

I went outside and took off after them.  He knew what he did because he took off but only went maybe 25 feet then realized that he wasn't gonna outrun me.  I got in his face and told him to pick up my trash cans.  Now I did this kind of shit when I was growing up but if a 6'3'', 210 pound man came running after me, I would have crapped my pants.  This little fucker tells me that he isn't gonna pick it up (he is maybe 12 years old).  So I get in his face again and tell him to pick it up.  He throws his hands up and says sarcastically, "out of respect for you I'll pick it up."  He picks up the can and says, sarcastically again, "I don't know where it was."  Meanwhile one of his buddies (this kid looked like a bigger punk than the one that I was yelling at) gets up in my face like he is gonna hit me, but was just smiling.

So, after he puts the can back, I tell him he better not do it again.  he responds with, "what are you gonna do, beat me up?  At this point, I am at a loss.  I know ( as well as he knows) if I lay a finger on this fucker he would tell mommy and daddy then I have a whole new mess on my hands.  Not to mention that I work at a childrens hospital and I don't want to risk losing my job.

Something tells me that if I toss this bastard around a bit (not hit him, just grab him by the shirt and drag him around), that it might scare him enough to knock it off.  But again, I don't want to open up a can of worms and risk any legal trouble.

I tell him next time that I would call the cops (only thing I could think of) and he says, "I ain't scared of the cops what are they gonna do?"  And he is right, what are they gonna do and I don't think it is worth it to call the cops for a few punk kids.

Its not so much the knocking the cans over, but stopping anyting else from happening to my property.  I've already had my car broken into twice and caught kids snooping around my house.  Could be benign adolescent behavior but I am just trying to protect my property.

Any suggestions?

yeah I could see why that would be a piss off, there's no need for that

Do you have a kid around their age?

If not, I recommend setting up a booby trap.  Take something slimy that stinks bad and coat the handles in it.  Then fill the trash cans with very VERY heavy stones, all the way up.

That way when they go to grab it, they get a hand full of nastiness and they probably hurt their back.

Whatever you do, do not touch them. A guy I know, had something similiar like this happen, he grabbed the kid, the kid falls to the ground. The kids parents took him to court, he got 2 years probation and had to pay something like $20K to the family.

Can't you secure your garbage cans? The other thing is to just let go, the kids will move on to bigger and better things or you can move.

I know where youre coming from...But you dont have to lay over for them brats, you have a right to defend your property, and your trash is your property, right?

Thats a good idea.

About 10 years a go I pulled a gun on 3 kids that were on my back porch fucking around at 4 A.M. They took off running.

The next day I inspected by back porch to find that they had placed a piece of duct tape over the light motion sensor so when the light would go off, it would not come back on again if anything moved wher it was aimed(Which was at my 2 cars)

Since then I have never had any issues with anyone in the neighborhood.

Anyways.... If I were you, I would start by trying to get some documentation(Video) of what these kids are doing. That would be my first step. Well maybe not my first step, but the proper one anyhow.

 

Also try putting bleech on the cans, it keeps the Raccoons away.

Gran Torino style

Walk around and execute each and every one I see

Th trap will just piss them off more and th cycle will continue.

2 ways to go. 1)Play reverse psychology and tell the little pukes that when you were their age you did the same stuff, but any chance we could call it a truce? I'm a cool guy and I'd definitely appreciate it and I don't want to be a dickhead with you guys.

Idea here is to befriend them. Hard to do but it works.

2) Next time just hold one of 'em by the shirt collar, call the cops and they'll scare 'em good. A talk with mommy an daddy about juniors behavior also goes along way when the police are in the kid's living room..

Tape some thumbtacks to the underside of the handles.

execution is the only answer

set up some water hoses pointed in strategic directions.

You of course have the code red button ready to fire.

ain't nothing funnier than punks that get soaked.

Get yourself one of those crotch attacking killer miniature Dobermans.

Tell him you are a lawyer and will rearrange his face and scar him for life and you will do no jail time because you have a clean record and were provoked. Scare the fuck out them by letting them know you will suffer the consequences by rearranging their face. They will mess with somebody else.

...or just abandon all that and bury punji stick pits smeared with fecies around the trash cans.

You'll hear it when ya get one.

oh i'm sorry, were those your trash cans?

 #1 is the best option.........it's pretty damn pride-swallowing at 1st but in the long run it is THE best idea. Might even have those kids keeping other kids off yer shit.

 .......#2 is hit or miss with parents today. Some people can't be convinced that Jr. would EVER do anything wrong.

But yo were in the right spot. Nobody could fault you for showing a gun at 4 in the morning. You could say you just thought your life was in danger. Easy way to get out of that...but if adam pulls a gun on these kids in the day time...he's fucked.

But yes...videotaping is the best solution.

The problem with #2 is that if it's more than 1 person...AND they're 12 years old...they will play dirty and try to get back at him for sure.

 

Also...putting shit on the handles may not work if they kick it around. That's where the rocks come in handy. But I like Goose's suggestion. Sprinklers or hoses would be funny...but once again...they'd look for revenge.

 

The only solution is to catch them in the act, get them in trouble with the cops, and if they get caught for a second time, they're kinda fucked.

i am disappointed that none of you have mentioned the paintball gun option  

 

just kidding  

 

 

 

I fucking hate how kids today think they are invincible. I used to do some shit like this as a kid, but I would be terrified if an adult chased me down because they WOULD beat you. Nowadays, you can't do anything even if it's your own property being defaced. Total bullshit. Society is in big trouble. I may move to the Canary Islands or something.

Screw this. I say you bring actual physical harm to these kids. Since these kids have never been beaten by their parents or have got their ass kicked in a fight they think they can get away with anything. I say you make a nail strip in the alley they walk down and put holes in their feet. You need to make those little fuckers cry somehow.

Or, you can line your garbage can with anthrax and put these kids out of your misery for good.

Or, you can do what Cartman did and chop up their parents and turn them into a nice chili and make the kids eat their parents haha.

Or lastly, just go to their house and point out to their shitty parents that what their kid(s) is doing is illegal and you will press charges if it happens again.

First try to communicate with their parents- if you get no satisfaction, at least the parents will be aware that this is happening-  

do something fucked up to a neighbor with the kids around. They will have respect for you and they wont mess with you anymore. Sucks to do it but they wont mess with you anymore bc they will think ur cool