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March Madness and the mayhem of the WWE cross paths again this year, with the National Championship being played the Monday following wrestling’s biggest show, Wrestlemania, on April 3.
Like last year, I’ve sorted through the remaining 16 teams in the NCAA Tournament and assigned them a wrestler that complements their style, skills and other little quirks.
For the teams included in last year’s “If the Sweet 16 were WWE wrestlers” blog, I’ve stuck with their wrestler. But for the programs who weren’t dancing at this time last season, we have a new slew of WWE Superstars ready to be paired up to the remaining field.
So, without further delay or description, “Coming down the aisle…”
Ohio State is John Cena
The Buckeyes were Cena in last year’s Sweet 16. Ohio State still has all the traits of the WWE’s Golden Boy. It is versatile, able to hit you with power inside or finesse from beyond the arc. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, OSU and Cena are damn good.
Kentucky is The Rock
Another carry-over from last year’s blog, the Wildcats are a lot like the People’s Champ was when he burst on the scene - young, brash and packed with talent. UK's freshmen studs Knight and Jones are a dynamic one-two punch just like the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow.
Marquette is Hardcore Holly
Scrappy and unheralded, the Golden Eagles go hand-in-hand with the golden buzzcut of the former “Sparkplug”. Marquette is fundamentally strong and makes up for a lack of star power by doing the little things right. Just like Hardcore, who was known as a great worker in his time as a mid-card jobber.
North Carolina is Kevin Nash
Big, bad, and packed with personality, the Tar Heels and Kevin Nash are a perfect fit. Nash quickly became a legend after butting heads with the greatest in the business. And even though he could pack a powerful punch, like UNC’s towers Henson and Zeller, Nash could also move for a big guy and was just “Too Sweet” for his foes – like Harrison Barnes’ jumper.
Duke is Ric Flair
Perhaps the perfect NCAAB-WWE mashup, the common thread between the Nature Boy and Duke doesn’t stop at the Carolina connection. Both Flair and the Blue Devils are the most hated but most respected in their respective sports. If Duke makes the Final Four again this year, it will be No. 16 – the same number of times Flair has won the World Championship. Wooooo!
Arizona is Brett “The Hitman” Hart
This once prominent program had fallen on hard times over the past few years. But they’ve clawed their way back amongst the NCAA’s elite. The Hitman has followed a similar rise from the ashes. He overcame a stroke and bad blood between him and the WWE, to once again take the main stage.
UConn is Triple H
Both the Huskies and Hunter Hearst Helmsley hail from Connecticut and much like HHH and his constant comebacks, the Huskies can never be counted out. Right now, no player is on the level of Kemba Walker (sorry Jimmer). The game-breaking guard is one step ahead of everyone on the court – a style of play that would make the “Cerebral Assassin” proud. Forget Triple H, Kemba is “The Game”.
San Diego State is Ahmed Johnson
Remember Ahmed Johnson? He was a flash in the pan during the 90’s, getting by on a monster physique and power. Johnson was tabbed as one of the most careless workers in the business and was constantly hurting guys due to a lack of fundamentals. The Aztecs may be in the same boat. SDSU is big and athletic but, like we saw vs. Temple, it can make some stupid mistakes.
Kansas is the Undertaker/Kane
The most famous brothers in college basketball are the most famous brothers in professional wrestling. Big and scary, the Morris boys will dunk over you or walk the top rope for a three in your grill. And with a talent-rich roster, KU has so many finishing moves – the chokeslam, Last Ride, Tombstone, Hell’s Gate…
Richmond is Rey Mysterio Jr.
Slap a luchadore mask on Richmond guard Kevin Anderson and you swear you’d have the NCAA’s version of Mysterio. The Spiders are a little team that could out of the A-10. And for what it’s worth, Mysterio rocked a Spiderman-inspired outfit at Wrestlemania a few years back.
VCU is Dean Malenko
The Rams have shocked their way to the Sweet 16 with efficient offense. They haven’t wowed with flash and finesse, but are making doubters respect their place among the field. Malenko carried himself the same way. “The Man of 1,000 Holds” could beat you in a number of ways, just like VCU, which had six players in double figures in its upset over Purdue.
Florida State is Sid Vicious
Whether he was Vicious, Psycho or Justice, Sid Eudy was a monster, who was impervious to pain (except that time he broke his leg jumping of the ropes, yuck!). The same attitude has carried FSU to the Sweet 16. The Seminoles long and athletic defense isn’t giving foes an inch, allowing only 36 percent shooting from the floor – tops in the country.
Butler is Dusty Rhodes
The Bulldogs were tagged as “The American Dream” last season. Butler is back in the mix again, with its hard-working defense and unexpected offense, just like Rhodes coming to life late in a match to land the Bionic Elbow for the win.
Wisconsin in Bob Backlund
The Badgers are always on the radar for college hoops fans, and have perhaps the most technically-sound group in the NCAA. They don’t turn the ball over, hit all their free throws and play tremendous defense. Backlund was the same way in the squared circle - an 'ole-school technician who made all the right moves.
BYU is Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka
Sure Jimmy and Jimmer sound a lot alike, and Jimmer “Superfly” Fredette could work as a nickname. But the main reason the high-flyer from the Fiji Islands is mentioned alongside BYU is because he was the only Mormon wrestler I could find.
Florida is Rick “The Model” Martel
Sunshine and swagger, that’s how “The Model” rolled after turning heel in the late 80’s and claiming Cocoa Beach, Florida as his new home. But behind the tan and pastel colors, Martel was one of the most talented wrestlers in the world. The Gators have just as many weapons and just as good a tan. They may not carry The Model's “Arrogance”, but UF certainly looks good making opponents look bad.
What do you think of these comparisons? Have a better NCB-WWE matchup?
Like last year, I’ve sorted through the remaining 16 teams in the NCAA Tournament and assigned them a wrestler that complements their style, skills and other little quirks.
For the teams included in last year’s “If the Sweet 16 were WWE wrestlers” blog, I’ve stuck with their wrestler. But for the programs who weren’t dancing at this time last season, we have a new slew of WWE Superstars ready to be paired up to the remaining field.
So, without further delay or description, “Coming down the aisle…”
Ohio State is John Cena
The Buckeyes were Cena in last year’s Sweet 16. Ohio State still has all the traits of the WWE’s Golden Boy. It is versatile, able to hit you with power inside or finesse from beyond the arc. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, OSU and Cena are damn good.
Kentucky is The Rock
Another carry-over from last year’s blog, the Wildcats are a lot like the People’s Champ was when he burst on the scene - young, brash and packed with talent. UK's freshmen studs Knight and Jones are a dynamic one-two punch just like the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow.
Marquette is Hardcore Holly
Scrappy and unheralded, the Golden Eagles go hand-in-hand with the golden buzzcut of the former “Sparkplug”. Marquette is fundamentally strong and makes up for a lack of star power by doing the little things right. Just like Hardcore, who was known as a great worker in his time as a mid-card jobber.
North Carolina is Kevin Nash
Big, bad, and packed with personality, the Tar Heels and Kevin Nash are a perfect fit. Nash quickly became a legend after butting heads with the greatest in the business. And even though he could pack a powerful punch, like UNC’s towers Henson and Zeller, Nash could also move for a big guy and was just “Too Sweet” for his foes – like Harrison Barnes’ jumper.
Duke is Ric Flair
Perhaps the perfect NCAAB-WWE mashup, the common thread between the Nature Boy and Duke doesn’t stop at the Carolina connection. Both Flair and the Blue Devils are the most hated but most respected in their respective sports. If Duke makes the Final Four again this year, it will be No. 16 – the same number of times Flair has won the World Championship. Wooooo!
Arizona is Brett “The Hitman” Hart
This once prominent program had fallen on hard times over the past few years. But they’ve clawed their way back amongst the NCAA’s elite. The Hitman has followed a similar rise from the ashes. He overcame a stroke and bad blood between him and the WWE, to once again take the main stage.
UConn is Triple H
Both the Huskies and Hunter Hearst Helmsley hail from Connecticut and much like HHH and his constant comebacks, the Huskies can never be counted out. Right now, no player is on the level of Kemba Walker (sorry Jimmer). The game-breaking guard is one step ahead of everyone on the court – a style of play that would make the “Cerebral Assassin” proud. Forget Triple H, Kemba is “The Game”.
San Diego State is Ahmed Johnson
Remember Ahmed Johnson? He was a flash in the pan during the 90’s, getting by on a monster physique and power. Johnson was tabbed as one of the most careless workers in the business and was constantly hurting guys due to a lack of fundamentals. The Aztecs may be in the same boat. SDSU is big and athletic but, like we saw vs. Temple, it can make some stupid mistakes.
Kansas is the Undertaker/Kane
The most famous brothers in college basketball are the most famous brothers in professional wrestling. Big and scary, the Morris boys will dunk over you or walk the top rope for a three in your grill. And with a talent-rich roster, KU has so many finishing moves – the chokeslam, Last Ride, Tombstone, Hell’s Gate…
Richmond is Rey Mysterio Jr.
Slap a luchadore mask on Richmond guard Kevin Anderson and you swear you’d have the NCAA’s version of Mysterio. The Spiders are a little team that could out of the A-10. And for what it’s worth, Mysterio rocked a Spiderman-inspired outfit at Wrestlemania a few years back.
VCU is Dean Malenko
The Rams have shocked their way to the Sweet 16 with efficient offense. They haven’t wowed with flash and finesse, but are making doubters respect their place among the field. Malenko carried himself the same way. “The Man of 1,000 Holds” could beat you in a number of ways, just like VCU, which had six players in double figures in its upset over Purdue.
Florida State is Sid Vicious
Whether he was Vicious, Psycho or Justice, Sid Eudy was a monster, who was impervious to pain (except that time he broke his leg jumping of the ropes, yuck!). The same attitude has carried FSU to the Sweet 16. The Seminoles long and athletic defense isn’t giving foes an inch, allowing only 36 percent shooting from the floor – tops in the country.
Butler is Dusty Rhodes
The Bulldogs were tagged as “The American Dream” last season. Butler is back in the mix again, with its hard-working defense and unexpected offense, just like Rhodes coming to life late in a match to land the Bionic Elbow for the win.
Wisconsin in Bob Backlund
The Badgers are always on the radar for college hoops fans, and have perhaps the most technically-sound group in the NCAA. They don’t turn the ball over, hit all their free throws and play tremendous defense. Backlund was the same way in the squared circle - an 'ole-school technician who made all the right moves.
BYU is Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka
Sure Jimmy and Jimmer sound a lot alike, and Jimmer “Superfly” Fredette could work as a nickname. But the main reason the high-flyer from the Fiji Islands is mentioned alongside BYU is because he was the only Mormon wrestler I could find.
Florida is Rick “The Model” Martel
Sunshine and swagger, that’s how “The Model” rolled after turning heel in the late 80’s and claiming Cocoa Beach, Florida as his new home. But behind the tan and pastel colors, Martel was one of the most talented wrestlers in the world. The Gators have just as many weapons and just as good a tan. They may not carry The Model's “Arrogance”, but UF certainly looks good making opponents look bad.
What do you think of these comparisons? Have a better NCB-WWE matchup?
0
nobody gave them a chance in this tournament.
Hint: it should be listed at the BOTTOM of the list.
Curt Henning. I'd have Ravishing Rick Rude on my to. Shawn Michaels should be on your list somewhere to.
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