Public Washrooms

Just curious as to how the brothers approach public washrooms.

Do you try to avoid them at all costs?  Do you get a kick out of letting major gastrointestinal noises pour out when other people are in there? What is your pre-toilet procedure to ensure maximum enjoyment?

I personally don't like them.  At work I use the handicapped toilet(Yes I am an a**....but we don't have any handicapped men working on my floor just a few women)

That is the cleanest toilet going....and I just can't help myself.

I also will locate a bathroom with only one toilet....for me there is nothing worse than someone interrupting my natural duties....especially when they have no conscience and just fire at will.  Sometimes, I will close shop and leave if I feel it could be a person who looks like they could shit death.

A couple wipe downs, helps warm up that sucker a bit and atleast appears to be clean.  No reading materials....I just like to sit and ponder.

Thoughts?

I'd rather pee in a Big Gulp cup, and have.   

Hahahah Scalbrine that's classic....and they are all true.

The shoe recognition scenario is so true.  I know exactly who wears the high end shoes, and who wears practically berkenstocks.  When I see work boots, I know it's one of the manly caretakers and I get the hell out of Dodge.

#3 is definitely the one that happens the most and pisses me off to no end, but #4 is the funniest because tons of people do that only to have to realize they still have to engage the door handle on the way out.....it's shocking some of these people manage to get out.

I shit 20 times a day so I have no choice but to use public bathrooms.

I also prefer the handicap stall. Why shit in a little duplex when the master suite is available?

One time I stepped out of the handicap stall and a handicapped guy was waiting. He was pissed. I thought he was going to break my kneecaps with his cane like I was invading his territory.

OK, motherfucker, I see you have a bad leg, your walking with a limp, but don't you shit normal. 

Sometimes you just gotta go...I dont think any reasonale person LIKES to use a public restroom...but its a fact of life so dont be a box.

It's true though, the closest one to me is like 60% handicapped stall, and the rest of the 40% of the bathroom is other stalls, urinals and sinks.

Like i know wheelchairs are big, but you could fit a church congregation in there.

And I think there are some people who do enjoy it...and they can perceive which individuals like myself, hate it the most.

And then they come attack me in my most vulnerable position.

shoe recognition man, that's worth the price of admission right there

I'm lucky enough to have my own private bathroom attached to my office at work.  Not that I'm special, just the luck of the draw when we moved to our present location.  My boss says its cause no one wants to use the same bathroom as me.

I do keep it clean though even though my office is a complete wreck.  Spotless actually due to some of the gals here at work asking for it occasionally when they are struggling with monthly issues.  Then it smells of vaginal blood and I am forced to use the community bathrooms and I feel like I am sluming or something.

Will piss anywhere, but taking a dump is another thing altogether - I definately need "Home Field Advantage" there, even if it means holding it in for an hour or so till I get there!

It takes a real emergency to get me in a public stall to curl one out...

The worst is people who use the stalls, and then don't double take on their way out.

No courtesy flush, no checking for left pubes, etc.  I am shocked how many grown men can't clean up after themselves...I've seen 5 year olds who do a better job.