Vanzack review of Suncruz gambling boat Sportsbook......

So today I had the obligation of accompanying one of my most annoying friends on the Suncruz boat out of Cape Canaveral Florida.  Lots of gambling, but the interesting part to me was the sportsbook.

It is hysterical.  Picture a Las Vegas book at an offstrip hotel about 40 years ago - with the magic erase marker board and handwritten betting slips.  You have a 45 minute ride out to the waters where you can actually bet, so there is lots of time for talking, mostly very loud talking by people looking for anyone to listen.

Things I heard on the way out:

"USF is a lock", "Betting a teaser is has the best odds in the whole casino", and the explanation of a guy who bets parlay cards, but bets both sides of one game with two teams he likes - essentially hedging a 3 teamer down to a 2 teamer before the games even start.

About 15 minutes in, the guys behind the counter go up with their eraser and start to refresh lines....  One old guy says to another old guy at the counter in a mafia voice "dems da lines fresh from Vegas".  Most lines are surprisingly close to real lines with some glaring differences....  Miami is -6 (real line 4), Houston Texans -2.5 (real line 3 with heavy juice) - some things like that.

So I am going to have some fun - so I ask the guy behind the counter "what are the limits on NCAAF" and he responds "more than you got...".   So Im going to have some fun, and I want to see how this works, so I say "5K on Clemson +6".  The place stops.  You could hear a pin drop.  The guy behind the counter laughs, asks if Im serious, and then calls someone on the cellphone.

Sure enough, I got approved, but felt like I was going to get assraped and mugged by 20 degenerates at any moment who have never seen 5k in their lives.  The guy writes on a ticket "Clemson +6" with some team number and the amount, then stamps it with some timeclock straight out of 1955 at a GM plant. 

Most people are betting parlays, teasers, and 20 dollar bets....

Overall though - I have to give this 4.5 out of 5 stars.  They will take a decent sized bet, and it is the only real option in my area, and I have to admit it was kind of fun.  Lots of people watching games while gambling - how can that not be fun?  But the average covers person would put these guys to shame in terms of gambling knowledge, this boat is square central redefined.

So now I have to go back and collect the ticket sometime next week, and Im sure if there are more bad lines I wont be able to resist betting them, which will make me go back to the boat again.

Anyone else ever go on this boat?

That sounds awesome.

If BarryDingles was the captain of the ship would you have given it a 5 out of 5?

If BarryDingle was the captain of the ship, it would have had 2 of every animal.

funny...I'm in Florida also maybe I'll check it out. If you hit big do they throw you overboard?

sounds like the coin boat from super mario 3.. lol some imagination you have.

Once again, crowkillers pull his pants down, and vanzack delivers the finishing blow.

It was almost like we planned it huh?

Quote Originally Posted by wallstreetcappers:

Great write up!

Vanzack, I love reading a good story, and I also am happy that you won your big wager.  Nothing like putting the arrogant bet taker in his place by putting your money where your mouth is.  Nothing like having fun and raping the rapist for a change. 

I go on the one out of Little River, SC. I highly advise to bring some muscle when you go to collect that 5K.  I won 3K on a ticket last year and think every degen was following me on the boat for the entire cruise.

Yep.  That's when the $10 and $20 bettors start trying to either befriend or mug you. 

you sir, are a fucking major clown...major, congrats

Thanks guys - Im thinking this might be a perfect place for a covers florida get together - but those never seem to work out.

Honestly - I kept thinking that someone at that sportsbook had to be a covers poster - but I doubt any of them even know what a computer is.

That depends...

If you are above the age of 70, and your type is toothless, grizzled, and smokers - then you are in luck.  Or 45 year old cocktail waitresses in dresses that used to fit them about 20 years ago.

If you are looking for college aged hotties, you are out of luck.