Whats an acceptable age difference?

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Author: [General Discussion] Topic: Whats an acceptable age difference?
ironlionzion722 PM ironlionzion722
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:06:55 AM

Just curious what everyone thinks.  I'm 28 and met an amazing girl at my work about 6 months ago.  I'm her boss which some might frown upon, but we fell for each other right away.  Anyways after about 4 months I took her virginity without any pressure from me, obviously I wanted to, but I told her whenever she's ready and she was excited and curious because it was all new to her.  I was her first real boyfriend because she has very strict parents, they arent religious just very overbearing and she still lives with them. So we've been sneaking around cuz of the work situation and her family, but she told a few close friends and all my friends and family knew and love her.  She is 19 and I'll be 29 in July so the diff is about 9 years.  Anyway she decided, (without consulting me) she was gonna just ask her mom if we could go out on a date or what not.  Long story short, like I said, they're are overbearing, and one thing lead to another and she ended up admitting everything about sneaking around and even about us having sex.  Her mom flipped out told her dad and it's a huge drama now.  They are acting like I'm a pedophile, and a rapist, and need help(Her mom even said she wished her daughter was younger so they could get me thrown in jail),  not to mention saying I need to quit, or they'll try to get me fired (which won't happen because although dating at the same location at my work is frowned upon, it only means a transfer not termination).  Anyways I don't feel like I did anything wrong,  I treated her with respect, love and really care about her so needless to say I'm really bummed.  We both want things to work but sneaking around now is out of the question, and her parents say if she sees me again they'll kick her out, and although I love her I feel like if she moves in with me now after such a short time it'll kill our relationship, as well as her relationship with her family.  Am I wrong and did I do anything wrong or what??????  Oh and her dad has a rather extensive gun collection, which makes me slightly nervous, although I figure they're just talking tough cuz he prob woulda already killed me since its been about 36 hours since it all went down.  However the corporate offices have been closed since Friday afternoon so I'm dreading coming in Monday and seeing a bunch of HR corporate goons at my office.  Only silver lining is sexual harrassment terminations(which I figure is the only thing the parents could nail me with) are collectable unemployment wise, and they even provide you with the paperwork to do it, so it may end up being a paid vacation but I'd much rather be out in the open, in a relationship with her and keep my job.  I've never taken any benefits, unemployment or any govt assistance and don't wanna start now.

pjrez PM pjrez
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:11:07 AM
Your age, divide by 2, and add 7.  21.  Sorry, 19 is too young
ironlionzion722 PM ironlionzion722
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:15:33 AM
fair enough but I mean c'mon
LanceLogan PM LanceLogan
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:32:43 AM
 You've done nothing wrong, a 10 yr age differnce is common.
PokinSmot PM PokinSmot
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:34:23 AM
you should marry her.....that's the only right thing to do.





Messier-11 PM Messier-11
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Posted: 1/29/2012 12:41:38 AM
I personally wouldn't do it. If she was out living on her own at college or something that's a different story. 
Johnzimbo34 PM Johnzimbo34
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:02:46 AM
I think Salty is currently banging her grandmother
MoneySRH PM MoneySRH
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:08:23 AM
She is a 19 year old women.

She can vote and go to War.

She is of legal age to consent.


You did absolutely nothing wrong.

dytide PM dytide
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:18:28 AM
got a good feeling about this thread


FishnGritz PM FishnGritz
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:20:50 AM
after age of 20, everything is fair game. 19 is right at the border so to be safe 20.
FishnGritz PM FishnGritz
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:23:16 AM
as for dating a co worker or even worse your employee you are in charge of THATS A NO NO.

Dont garbage where you EAT
MoneySRH PM MoneySRH
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:41:12 AM
i think dating an employee that you're in charge of is worse than the whole age thing.
ironlionzion722 PM ironlionzion722
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Posted: 1/29/2012 1:58:44 AM

i know don't dip your pen in the company ink blah blah but its commonplace in the industry im in we work together sometimes 40-50 hrs a week.  It happens all the time

 

GameDayDog PM GameDayDog
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Posted: 1/29/2012 2:51:12 AM
The gap becomes acceptable as they get older. Once she hits 25, nothing would matter. At 19, they are fun to look at, but let's face it, you're dealing with a girl that's still confessing to Mom & Dad. You can't take her to a nightclub, a bar or Dave & Busters. Get out while you can and don't get your meat where you get your bread ($$).

Your case does spark memories. I met a girl at a nightclub, got her number, went to the movies. About a week later, I smashed. She would come over, stay 3 - 4 days at my place, go home & come back. All my boys liked her, she was cool. I was 20, she was 18. After 3 weeks, she told me she was 17, I was ok with that. Then later, she confessed to being 16. I ended it because I didn't want to turn 21 with a 16 year old girlfriend. That was 18 years ago & I still wonder how she's doing.
dl36 PM dl36
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Posted: 1/29/2012 3:02:10 AM
this thread is nothing with out pictures...

If she is 19 and looks 24 then you are all good...

If she is 19 and looks 14... then people might wonder
EricLinny PM EricLinny
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Posted: 1/29/2012 3:05:28 AM
Dude; smash that young pooty
TILTOLOGIC PM TILTOLOGIC
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Posted: 1/29/2012 3:06:46 AM
I've noticed the last couple years that the younger I go the more likely they are to want to have me creampie them. 

Whatever works.
TheGoldenGoose PM TheGoldenGoose
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Posted: 1/29/2012 3:13:15 AM

Wifey is 9 years and 10 months younger than I.

Young flesh is good for your ego and sex life. 
ironlionzion722 PM ironlionzion722
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Posted: 1/29/2012 3:15:49 AM
she was eager to learn like I said.  But I don't wanna get off on some typical guy crap cuz I feel like this is love, and we're meant to be.  We just talked online for the last 5 hrs analyzing our options and trying to figure about the best plan.  Her mom is just so unreasonable and hypocritical.
MoneySRH PM MoneySRH
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Posted: 1/29/2012 4:00:14 AM
If you can get the man of the house to respect you, then it's all smooth sailing from there. I went up to my girls father man to man and told him my plans. Show him how much balls you have and he will respect you.
Ktrain PM Ktrain
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Posted: 1/29/2012 4:08:44 AM
How do you date someone that you can't even take into a bar? What the hell do you two have in common other than working at the same place? Which btw is a huge no no, let alone the fact that you are her boss. 

The longer this continues the worse this is going to end for you(I hope I am wrong about that however). 

Plus you took her V card so she is going to be more enamored with you.

I know this seems like fun for now because it is most likely a change of pace from the normal chicks that you date. But she is only 19 and is about to experience REAL LIFE. Not that high school bull garbage where everyone lives inside of a small bubble. She is going to be meeting all sorts of people and experience all sorts of new things. You have already gone through that. 

I give you credit though. I am 30 and going back to school and I am around a bunch of chicks who are aged 18-20 and I really couldn't fathom actually dating one of these chicks. Most of them make the chicks from the movie "Clueless" look like Harvard grads. I honestly can't believe how naive some of them are sometimes. Let alone the fact that most of them rely on Mommy and Daddy for everything.

Anyways, I hope things go well for you in this venture. I think as time moves on though you will realize how much an age difference 10 years is between your specific ages. Situations like you wanting to go to a bar and she can't get in are going to be difficult. If you were 40 and she were 30 it would be no biggie. But 19 and 29 is different. And that isn't counting the boss/employee aspect. 
steve1203 PM steve1203
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Posted: 1/29/2012 4:08:52 AM
QUOTE Originally Posted by GameDayDog:

The gap becomes acceptable as they get older. Once she hits 25, nothing would matter. At 19, they are fun to look at, but let's face it, you're dealing with a girl that's still confessing to Mom & Dad. You can't take her to a nightclub, a bar or Dave & Busters. Get out while you can and don't get your meat where you get your bread ($$).

Your case does spark memories. I met a girl at a nightclub, got her number, went to the movies. About a week later, I smashed. She would come over, stay 3 - 4 days at my place, go home & come back. All my boys liked her, she was cool. I was 20, she was 18. After 3 weeks, she told me she was 17, I was ok with that. Then later, she confessed to being 16. I ended it because I didn't want to turn 21 with a 16 year old girlfriend. That was 18 years ago & I still wonder how she's doing.


A 20 year old male having sex with a 16 year old female in my state of California is a big no no.
Ktrain PM Ktrain
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Posted: 1/29/2012 4:09:01 AM
And btw, I love the avatar pic. 
GameDayDog PM GameDayDog
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Posted: 1/29/2012 5:11:19 AM
QUOTE Originally Posted by steve1203:



A 20 year old male having sex with a 16 year old female in my state of California is a big no no.


Shyt, I think it's a big no-no everywhere, except Alabama. Believe me, I've checked ID's of women ever since. When I told my friends she was 16, they were shocked. We were clueless.
GameDayDog PM GameDayDog
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Posted: 1/29/2012 5:13:36 AM
QUOTE Originally Posted by Ktrain:

How do you date someone that you can't even take into a bar? What the hell do you two have in common other than working at the same place? Which btw is a huge no no, let alone the fact that you are her boss. 

The longer this continues the worse this is going to end for you(I hope I am wrong about that however). 

Plus you took her V card so she is going to be more enamored with you.

I know this seems like fun for now because it is most likely a change of pace from the normal chicks that you date. But she is only 19 and is about to experience REAL LIFE. Not that high school bull garbage where everyone lives inside of a small bubble. She is going to be meeting all sorts of people and experience all sorts of new things. You have already gone through that. 

I give you credit though. I am 30 and going back to school and I am around a bunch of chicks who are aged 18-20 and I really couldn't fathom actually dating one of these chicks. Most of them make the chicks from the movie "Clueless" look like Harvard grads. I honestly can't believe how naive some of them are sometimes. Let alone the fact that most of them rely on Mommy and Daddy for everything.

Anyways, I hope things go well for you in this venture. I think as time moves on though you will realize how much an age difference 10 years is between your specific ages. Situations like you wanting to go to a bar and she can't get in are going to be difficult. If you were 40 and she were 30 it would be no biggie. But 19 and 29 is different. And that isn't counting the boss/employee aspect. 


I feel you... I'm back in college and those girls.. Lawd have mercy. I don't think we have much of anything in common.. ( Except I like Phineas & Ferb ) ... otherwise, they're just a lot of fun to look at.

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