Posted: 8/2/2012 6:46:17 PM
#5. The Olympic Village Is a Nonstop Orgy
Imagine living in a town populated by young, toned, athletic
mini-gods at the peak of their physical prime. Imagine that they've all
dedicated years of their lives to disciplining their hot, fatless bodies
for a shot to live in this little town for a few weeks. And here they
are, all 10,000 of them, minus their parents and spouses and the daily
regimens that have governed their lives up to this point, in an exotic
location, with lots of spare time. Let's put it this way: At the 1988
Seoul games, there was such a problem with used condoms showing up on
the roof of the British men's housing that the Olympic Association had
to ban outdoor sex.
Can you imagine a crisis of condom littering so profound that an
official ban on publicly whipping out your Olympic-quality junk was
required? Can you fathom the degrading conversation that had to occur
between Olympic officials and grizzled coaches to get this ban enacted?
And it was no isolated situation -- from what we can tell, every single
Olympic Village since, well, ever, has been knee-deep in genital juice.