There goes three years of high school Spanish and all the episodes of “Dora the Explorer” I’m forced to watch with my daughter in two sentences.
I’ve been getting bombarded by Cinco de Mayo commercials during my commute. And they’ve worked – I’m anxiously awaiting some cerveza and tequila Wednesday night after work.
To distract me until tequila time, I thought we could discuss the best drinking holidays. Here are five that I think are overrated or underrated in terms of pure drinking pleasure.
Cinco de Mayo: Overrated I really like cerveza. Tecate’s my favorite. The “Most Interesting Man in the World” makes me crave Dos Equis from time to time, too. I’m a tequila fan, as well. I’ve graduated from room-temperature Cuervo neat to chilled Patron or Milagro with all the fixings. Mexican food is pretty darn tasty, too. So what’s not to like? Well, why does every cheesy rock station have to sponsor a Cinco de Mayo fest, filling bars with obnoxious, testosterone-juiced frat boys, bad music and bimbos? If some bar would get a little creative with their Cinco bash—maybe something like everyone has to fire back five shots of bar tequila then hit a fat Shaq piñata—I gladly would change my overrated opinion of the holiday.
St. Patrick’s Day: Way overrated I’m not a big fan of green poop, which is in most cases a direct result of drinking green beer or eating sour apple Twizzlers (Yum). Irish Car Bombs are delicious, but you’re most likely going to run into the same crowd as Cinco de Mayo.
New Year’s Eve: Overrated When I was single, I used to have this tradition of pissing right at midnight on New Year’s Eve. The bathroom’s always empty, I didn’t have to watch everyone kiss and it was a good time to reflect on what was going on in my life the last time I was pissing at midnight on New Year’s. The down side of drinking on New Year’s Eve is trying to shake off the hangover in time to bet the early bowl games. Would it kill them to push the Outback Bowl back an hour?
Memorial Day/Labor Day: Underrated Both include days off, bbq, generally good weather and beer. If you’re really lucky, you’ll get do all of the above at the lake. What’s not to like?
Christmas Eve: Vastly underrated. There’s something romantic about sitting around the Christmas tree, listening to Bing Crosby and enjoying a scotch with pops and the family. I’m not sure if romantic’s the exact word there, especially with Dad and Grandma firing turkey toots into their recliners, but you know what I’m saying. Along with gas, my family’s Christmas tradition includes mimosas with breakfast. It’s quickly followed by the best nap of the year.
Thanksgiving: Underrated I’ve carefully eased my way out of family obligations on Turkey Day, by working, golfing or blatantly lying. It’s resulted is some great times watching football with my good winter buddy Jameson. (Jameson went 5-0 last Thanksgiving). I’m especially looking forward to this Thanksgiving. We actually get a good game with the Saints visiting Dallas. The bars are always nice and gloomy on Thanksgiving night, too. You get a lot of lonely old dudes just sitting around enjoying a cocktail. Good times!
All right, so there are my drunk holiday ratings. What’s yours? Fiesta! Margarita!
There goes three years of high school Spanish and all the episodes of “Dora the Explorer” I’m forced to watch with my daughter in two sentences.
I’ve been getting bombarded by Cinco de Mayo commercials during my commute. And they’ve worked – I’m anxiously awaiting some cerveza and tequila Wednesday night after work.
To distract me until tequila time, I thought we could discuss the best drinking holidays. Here are five that I think are overrated or underrated in terms of pure drinking pleasure.
Cinco de Mayo: Overrated I really like cerveza. Tecate’s my favorite. The “Most Interesting Man in the World” makes me crave Dos Equis from time to time, too. I’m a tequila fan, as well. I’ve graduated from room-temperature Cuervo neat to chilled Patron or Milagro with all the fixings. Mexican food is pretty darn tasty, too. So what’s not to like? Well, why does every cheesy rock station have to sponsor a Cinco de Mayo fest, filling bars with obnoxious, testosterone-juiced frat boys, bad music and bimbos? If some bar would get a little creative with their Cinco bash—maybe something like everyone has to fire back five shots of bar tequila then hit a fat Shaq piñata—I gladly would change my overrated opinion of the holiday.
St. Patrick’s Day: Way overrated I’m not a big fan of green poop, which is in most cases a direct result of drinking green beer or eating sour apple Twizzlers (Yum). Irish Car Bombs are delicious, but you’re most likely going to run into the same crowd as Cinco de Mayo.
New Year’s Eve: Overrated When I was single, I used to have this tradition of pissing right at midnight on New Year’s Eve. The bathroom’s always empty, I didn’t have to watch everyone kiss and it was a good time to reflect on what was going on in my life the last time I was pissing at midnight on New Year’s. The down side of drinking on New Year’s Eve is trying to shake off the hangover in time to bet the early bowl games. Would it kill them to push the Outback Bowl back an hour?
Memorial Day/Labor Day: Underrated Both include days off, bbq, generally good weather and beer. If you’re really lucky, you’ll get do all of the above at the lake. What’s not to like?
Christmas Eve: Vastly underrated. There’s something romantic about sitting around the Christmas tree, listening to Bing Crosby and enjoying a scotch with pops and the family. I’m not sure if romantic’s the exact word there, especially with Dad and Grandma firing turkey toots into their recliners, but you know what I’m saying. Along with gas, my family’s Christmas tradition includes mimosas with breakfast. It’s quickly followed by the best nap of the year.
Thanksgiving: Underrated I’ve carefully eased my way out of family obligations on Turkey Day, by working, golfing or blatantly lying. It’s resulted is some great times watching football with my good winter buddy Jameson. (Jameson went 5-0 last Thanksgiving). I’m especially looking forward to this Thanksgiving. We actually get a good game with the Saints visiting Dallas. The bars are always nice and gloomy on Thanksgiving night, too. You get a lot of lonely old dudes just sitting around enjoying a cocktail. Good times!
All right, so there are my drunk holiday ratings. What’s yours? Fiesta! Margarita!
Good Job! How bout that pocket week between Christmas and New Year's with Bowl games nightly and vacation week for most. I like to take advantage then. Handicap during the day, imbibe at night.
Good Job! How bout that pocket week between Christmas and New Year's with Bowl games nightly and vacation week for most. I like to take advantage then. Handicap during the day, imbibe at night.
Easter is a pretty good one as well. Boiled eggs and beer go well together, but when you fart the naxt day, you will smell like something has crawled up in you and died
Easter is a pretty good one as well. Boiled eggs and beer go well together, but when you fart the naxt day, you will smell like something has crawled up in you and died
I vote St. Patties Day by far. It's pretty much the only holiday that starts with kegs and eggs and continues with nothing but an entire day of drinking. It doesn't involve having to give anyone stupid ass gifts and you don't have to waste your time with boring ass relatives. Just hanging with friends and drinking. Plus lots of NCAA tourney gambling.
I vote St. Patties Day by far. It's pretty much the only holiday that starts with kegs and eggs and continues with nothing but an entire day of drinking. It doesn't involve having to give anyone stupid ass gifts and you don't have to waste your time with boring ass relatives. Just hanging with friends and drinking. Plus lots of NCAA tourney gambling.
some sport holidays like your hometown teams opening day, the first day of march madness and the super bowl maybe if you take the next days off work of course.
some sport holidays like your hometown teams opening day, the first day of march madness and the super bowl maybe if you take the next days off work of course.
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