This is the worst week of the year.
In part because the stupid Olympics aren’t quite over, but also because we still have one week of practice NFL games to go and the colleges are a week away from starting.
Hang the pigskin carrot in front of us, go ahead. See if we care. We aren’t going to chase it. Not yet. I will not bore you with any other NFL practice plays. It’s ridiculous to bet on exhibition games.
I’m angry because of stupid stuff like the Bears throwing a Hail Mary TD on the last play of their game with the 49ers on Thursday. No, it didn’t cost me the spread or even the total. But it reminded me that idiotic stuff happens in practice games and you should never rely on anything when players who are about to be cut get involved in the final few plays.
So before we offer up some college football betting advice and maybe even sneak a peek at the first week of NFL action, I’d like to usher out the Olympics the best way I can.
With a tidal wave of West Coast bitterness.
We saw nothing live. Not one event. The TV coverage was a joke, especially if you had the radio or TV on during the day. When Michael Phelps was making history in real time, we were watching — believe it or not — the women’s marathon.
Most of time, we saw rowing. Miles and miles of rowing. And more beach volleyball than should be legal. We invented beach volleyball out here and NBC somehow managed to ruin it be showing every grainy set, spike and dig.
We saw Usain Bolt’s incredible 200 meter run about five hours after it happened. What’s scary is that it still gave me chills, even though I knew the results.
Now that he has three golds and three world records, I give him a slight edge over Phelps for “Man of the Olympics.”
Oh, stop. Don’t give me the 8 vs. 3 argument. OK, you can, but the fact that Bolt set world records in the 100 and 200 in the same Olympics and it had never been done before, that put him over the top.
If a swimmer didn’t set a world record in these Olympics, he or she was in the minority.
Bolt’s 200 time (19.30) was not expected. Michael Johnson’s record (19.32) was thought to be safe for at least 10 years.
I don’t think swimming is all that interesting. You can swim 50 meters or 400, backstroke or breaststroke. You can share the work with relay team members and you can wear those bizarre body suits. You can be 41-year-old Dara Torres, momentarily tugging at the heartstrings of all over-the-hill athletes.
Doesn’t matter. There is a dorkiness to swimming that takes away from what Phelps, et al, did.
Fastest man in the world? Now that’s important. Clowning the rest of the field — damn near running backwards while proving you’re the fastest and setting a new world record? Insane. Incredible.
The IOC chided Bolt for his brashness, but the IOC is a bunch of stiff no-fun geezers who still can’t figure out how to spend all the money China gave them to make sure Beijing would host the Olympics.
One way to make the Olympics better is to slice off about 30 events. No way should there be more than one or two shooting events, one or two sailing events.
Tennis is a stupid idea. They already have 40 or so tournaments during the year.
Sports that involve too much makeup (synchronized swimming and rhythmic gymnastics) are out. Speaking of gymnastics, could the U.S. coaches (and TV announcers) whine more about perceived scoring injustices? Could the Chinese cheat more?
You know that those Chinese gymnasts aren’t 16. Hell, they barely look 13.
But there is NO chance that the IOC or anyone associated with the Olympics will bust them because it would ruin China’s image as hosts. It would, in the end, taint the entire Olympics and there is too much money at stake to follow through with any punishment.
The fix was in from the start.
Olympic baseball is useless because some countries send their best teams and other countries (U.S.) send third-stringers.
Handball? Exactly.
The soccer tournament had all the passion of boiled turnips. Brazil didn’t win. That’s all you need to know. Olympic soccer doesn’t rank in the Top 5 of importance among soccer-mad countries.
Basketball? Keep it. As long as we send teams coached by Mike k and those teams remind players like Pau Gasol of Spain and Manu Ginobli of Argentina that they are lucky to even be in the NBA.
COLLEGE FOOTBALL
A game to keep an eye on is Tennessee at UCLA. The spread is reasonable right now (-7) and before it gets too high, bet the Vols. UCLA is a mess at QB and the Bruins defense will eventually wear down.
Washington State will host Oklahoma State on Aug. 30th and from what I’m seeing, the Cougars will be awful at the start of the season. Okie State has a nice group of returners and I look for the Cowboys to easily cover the smallish number (-6.5).
I like Cal to handle Michigan State (-4.5) because the Bears have depth on defense and Jeff Tedford’s offense will always score, even though the receiving corps is untested and sophomore Kevin Riley is taking over for senior Nate Longshore at quarterback.
Cal has a lot to prove after last year’s dismal end-of-the-year tailspin. Not sure if they can prove it all year, but the Spartans tend to start slow and don’t travel well.
Hawaii was destroyed by Georgia in the Sugar Bowl last season. That’s nothing compared to what’s going to happen to them in Florida in Week 1. Right now, the spread is 35. It should be 50.
USC travels to Virginia. The Trojans haven’t had a very good offseason what with injuries and disciplinary actions. But USC has enough talent to overcome the thuggery that goes with the program. Still, I wouldn’t touch this game. Virginia can cover the 20-point spread. But I don’t trust them.
The Week 1 game I like best? It’s Buffalo over UTEP. The Bulls are one of the up and coming teams in the NCAA with a good young coach and a lot of speed.
Final: Buffalo 31, UTEP 13.. The spread right now is Buffalo -3.
I'm going to let the NFL play those final useless practice games before offering up any Week 1 advice.
Fair enough?
Good.