John Fitzgerald Kennedy has three names.
Elvis Aron Presley also has three names.
Both names are, amazingly, comprised of consonants AND vowels.

Kennedy was born in 1917, and died in 1963.
Elvis was born in 1935, and died in 1977.
All 4 years have EXACTLY 4 digits.


Kennedy was 'The President'.
Elvis was 'The King'.


Kennedy commanded a PT-Boat in the Pacific for the Navy.
Elvis drove a truck in West Germany for the Army.


Kennedy had a secretary named Lincoln.
Lincoln was the name of the President during the Civil War.
During the Civil War, there was Colonels.
'The Colonel' was the nick-name of Elvis's manager, Tom Parker.

Kennedy married a woman named Jacqueline Bouvier.
She later remarried a Greek named Onassis, one of the richest men in the world.
Elvis married a woman named Priscilla Beaulieu.
Their daughter married a geek named Jackson, one of the richest uh... PERSONs in the world. Jackson was also Greek... at heart. (i.e.: he liked little boys)

Kennedy approved the 'Bay of Pigs' invasion.
Elvis regularly invaded Kentucky Fried Chicken.

Kennedy's face is stamped into the American Half-Dollar.
Elvis's face is tatooed on some white-trash woman's fat ass in Mississippi.

And the most startling coincidence of all...

Kennedy died in DALLAS.
Elvis died on the TOILET.





Richard Nixon wanted J.F.K. "Out of the way" so that Nixon could be elected president in 1968.

BI Director J. Edgar Hoover wanted J.F.K. killed because Hoover was in love with a Marilyn Monroe impersonator who Hoover thought was having an affair with J.F.K.

Elvis Aaron Presley was a patsy of J. Edgar Hoover who would "do anything" to get America back on the "right path to glory, huh!"

Elvis Aaron Presley had almost hypnotic control over the president of his Dallas area fan club. The head of his fan club, one Lee Harvey Oswald.